Process Diagram

Band 6+: Biofuel production: how ethanol is made. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: Biofuel production: how ethanol is made. Write at least 150 words.

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The image illustrates ethanol production from biofuel starting with energy (sunlight + carbon dioxide) aiding plant/tree growth; this is followed by harvesting, and pre-processing which releases carbon dioxide; processing involves breaking down cellulose into sugars; microbes are added to convert sugars into ethanol; ethanol is used as a fuel, releasing carbon dioxide again in the process.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The diagram below shows the production of a biofuel named ethanol.

The production of ethanol is a multi-step linear process in which cellulose derived from trees and plants is treated by chemicals, while this results in the formation (production) of sugars, being finally blended with microbes.

It can be seen that ethanol is made from biological materials:plants and trees. Firstly plants and trees are being saturated by sunlight and CO2,which helps them to grow. The next stage is made by humans to harvest them and then preprocess in a special machine to an extract of cellulose. This cellulose is being processed with chemicals to form sugars. The final stage is microbes are added to the sugars to create the final ethanol fuel. Ethanol fuel is used by many types of vehicles that emit carbon dioxide into nature and the process restarts again.

Word Count: 142

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

ethanol: 4

cellulose: 3

trees: 3

sugars: 3

being: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report provides a clear and comprehensive overview of the ethanol production process. It successfully identifies the cyclical nature of the process and covers all the key stages mentioned in the description, from the initial growth phase to the final emission of carbon dioxide. The progression of steps is logical and easy to follow. To improve, ensure that the introductory paragraph does not simply repeat the prompt and that the overview (the second paragraph) more clearly summarizes the entire cycle rather than just focusing on the chemical breakdown. Additionally, minor grammatical refinements regarding tense consistency would enhance the overall flow. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical sequence, but the progression between sentences could be smoother. While you use some cohesive devices like 'Firstly' and 'The next stage', the transition between the overview and the body paragraphs is a bit abrupt. To improve, try using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next to create a more seamless narrative of the process.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the task, but it is somewhat repetitive and basic in places. For example, the word 'process' and 'final' are used multiple times. To reach a higher band, aim to use more sophisticated synonyms and varied phrasing (e.g., instead of 'the process restarts again', you could use 'completing a cyclical process'). Additionally, ensure that word choices are precise; for instance, 'saturated by sunlight' is not quite the correct collocation for plant growth.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical issues that affect the clarity of the report. There are instances of awkward phrasing (e.g., 'The next stage is made by humans to harvest them') and errors in sentence structure (e.g., 'The final stage is microbes are added...'). You should focus on mastering complex sentence structures, such as using relative clauses ('...which results in...') and passive voice ('...are harvested and then pre-processed...') more accurately, as the passive voice is essential for describing industrial processes.

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