I have made many crucial decisions in my life. The most difficult decision would be telling lies to my family about my grandmother’s situation. See, threw up a little bit blood in his vomit and my elder brother who is in Australia, he told me to take my grandmother to the hospital. So I took her to the hospital and done some biopsy and later on after a few days we found out that she had a third stage lung cancer and I was devastated by the news and I didn’t know how to handle it. It was quite difficult to accept because I can’t say those things to my dad that her mother has a stage 3 cancer because my father is also BP patient so it might cause the negative impact on him because of the news. So I lied to my family member that she had a cancer but it is curable. That is not that devastating. So she will be fine in the future. I lied them about that. That’s how I made my decision. I felt very very sad about the decision I made and the situation I faced. I was so emotional and so guilty at the same moment because I haven’t done nothing for my grandmother because she was passing away in front of me. I knew that she would die for sure not today not tomorrow but within a few months. So like I was crying every fucking day having nightmares so at the end I saw her dying in front of me. She left her shawl and took the last breath in front of me in our home. That’s so so I can’t even imagine whenever I try to imagine those things I end up breaking, breaking up.
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