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Band 6+: chart of students of university who speak other language than english

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The image depicts two pie charts illustrating percentages of British students with language proficiency beyond English for the years 2000 and 2010. In 2000, data shows 20% spoke only English, 15% French only, 10% German only, 15% Spanish only, and 15% another language, with 10% speaking two additional languages and 15% having no ability in another language. By 2010, the percentages were 10% for no other languages, 10% for German only, 10% for another language, 15% for two languages, 20% for Spanish only, 15% for French only, and 10% for only English.

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The charts illustrate the percentage of students at one university in England who can speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010.

Overall, the proportion of Spanish speakers was the highest in 2000 and 2010. From 2000 to 2010, the percentage of students speak Spanish, two other languages and another language increased, but that of no other language and French decreased.

The percentage of British students speaking Spanish accounted for 30% in 2000, and it was increased by 5% in 2010. Moreover, the proportions of students using another language was lower than that in Spanish, at 15% in 2000 , and it also increased to 20% in 2010. In 2000, the percentage of people using two other languages in that university accounted for 10%, which was lower than that in another language, and it witnessed an increase to 20% in 2010.

The proportion of students who only speak English was high in 2000, at 20%, but it decreased sharply to 10% in 2010. Similarly, the percentage of students speaking French fell from 15% to 10%. Additionally, the percentage of Germany speakers remained 10% from 2000 to 2010.

Word Count: 190

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 6

students: 6

other: 4

spanish: 4

language: 4

speak: 3

languages: 3

another: 3

increased: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report appropriately addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the two years. It includes an overview and specific data for most categories. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions: the percentage for Spanish in 2000 is stated as 30%, but the visual description indicates 15% (or possibly 30% if combining Spanish only and another language, but this is not clearly explained). Also, the report omits the 'no ability' category in the 2000 data and misstates the 2010 figure for 'two languages' as 20% instead of 15%. To improve, ensure all categories are covered and data is accurately reported. Additionally, avoid vague phrases like 'another language' without specifying what it refers to, and use more precise language for trends (e.g., 'increased by 5 percentage points' instead of 'increased by 5%').

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is logically organized with a clear overall statement and a body that groups data by trends. However, the flow could be improved by using more cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs. For instance, the transition from the overview to the detailed paragraphs is abrupt, and the second paragraph could be better connected to the third. Consider using linking phrases like 'In contrast' or 'Similarly' more effectively to enhance readability.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is appropriate for the task, with terms like 'accounted for', 'witnessed an increase', and 'decreased sharply'. However, there is some repetition and lack of variety in expressions (e.g., 'the percentage of' is used repeatedly). To improve, try to use synonyms and more precise language, such as 'the proportion of', 'the figure for', or 'the share of', and vary the verbs used to describe changes (e.g., 'rose', 'declined', 'remained stable').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable range of grammatical structures, including comparative forms and complex sentences. However, there are several errors and awkward phrasings that affect clarity. For example, 'the percentage of students speak Spanish' should be 'the percentage of students who speak Spanish', and 'it was increased' should be 'it increased'. Additionally, 'Germany speakers' should be 'German speakers'. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and article usage to improve accuracy.

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chart of students of university who speak other language than english

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chart of students of university who speak other language than english

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Band 6+: chart of students of university who speak other language than english

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chart of students of university who speak other language than english

chart of students of university who speak other language than english

chart of students of university who speak other language than english

chart of students of university who speak other language than english

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