Letter

Band 7+: During a recent plane journey, you sat next to a businessman who owns a chain of restaurants. You talked to him and he suggested that you should contact him about a possible job in one of his restaurants. Write a letter to this businessman. In your letter remind him when and where you met tell him what kind of job you are interested in say why you think you would be suitable for the job Begin as follows: Dear ... ,

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Dear Sir,

I hope this letter finds you in good spirits. I hope you remember me from the trip we had shared together in the flight on 2nd July, while returning to Canada. I am writing this letter to express my interest in applying for the job vacancy you are having in one of your restaurants.

I have pursued my degree in the field of business management. Therefore, I am interested in the job roles where I can showcase my problem solving, tasks managing, and labour managing skills.

Currently, with my current employer, I am employed as a Senior Manager. As of today, I have 5 years of experience in this field. My current job role includes managing work schedules of the staff members, calculating profits, and making sure that the store has sufficient resources to deliver excellent customer services.

I am attaching my resume for you reference.

I hope to hear from you soon.

Yours sincerely,

Dhwani Trivedi

Word Count: 159

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

managing: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses all three prompts from the task effectively. You clearly reminded the recipient of your meeting, specified the type of role you are seeking, and provided relevant experience to justify your suitability. The tone is professional and appropriate for the context. To improve and reach a higher score, you could make the connection between your current management experience and the specific restaurant industry more explicit. Additionally, while the content is good, some phrasing could be more natural; for example, instead of 'the job vacancy you are having,' you might use 'the potential opportunities we discussed.' Ensuring a smoother transition between your background and your interest in his specific business would also enhance the flow.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized and follows the requirements of the prompt. Each paragraph addresses a specific bullet point, which makes the progression easy to follow. However, the transitions between sentences could be smoother. For instance, the transition from discussing your degree to your current role could be more fluid. Using more sophisticated cohesive devices instead of starting multiple sentences with 'I' would improve the flow.

Lexical Resource

You have used a good range of professional vocabulary such as 'express my interest', 'pursued my degree', and 'sufficient resources'. To reach a higher band, try to avoid repetitive phrasing (e.g., 'current employer... currently... current job role') and use more natural collocations. Instead of 'tasks managing' or 'labour managing', use 'task management' or 'workforce management' to sound more professional and native-like.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The grammar is generally clear and the meaning is never lost, but there are several errors in word formation and preposition usage. For example, 'in the flight' should be 'on the flight', and 'job vacancy you are having' is awkward; 'the vacancy you mentioned' would be better. Additionally, 'for you reference' should be 'for your reference'. Work on using a wider variety of complex sentence structures to demonstrate higher grammatical control.

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Write a letter to a hotel manager in another city for an upcoming 2 day business trip for you and your colleagues. In your letter, You should tell : Introduce yourself and colleagues give information about the business meeting tell other requests you moght have.

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