Multiple Graphs

Band 6+: Summarize the information by selecting and resporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: Summarize the information by selecting and resporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image includes a pie chart and a bar chart. The pie chart shows the "Location of dance classes": Private studios 48%, School halls (after-school) 24%, Community halls & other 18%, and College-based studios 10%. The bar chart represents "Types of dance classes (by age group)," with number of students on the x-axis and dance types on the y-axis, divided into Under 11 and 11-16 age groups. Ballet: Under 11 approximately 275, 11-16 around 450. Tap: Under 11 about 160, 11-16 approximately 370. Modern: Under 11 nearly 250, 11-16 approximately 400.

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The pie chart illustrates the location while the bar chart shows the types of dance classes, divided by age groups, attended by the young people in a town in Australia.

Overall, Private Studios account for the biggest proportion of the location. Meanwhile, College-based Studios are the smallest proportion. Ballet classes are dominated by children under 11. On the other hand, Modern dance classes are mostly attended by young people ranging from 11 to 16 years old.

As shown in the pie chart, Private Studios makes up for almost half of the whole pie chart with 48%, followed by School Halls or After School classes with 24%. Community Hall and Others came up as the second least with 18% while College-based Studios are the least attended with only 10%.

The bar chart clarifies most children under 11 attended Ballet classes with approximately 600 students. On the contrary, most young people in the age group of 11 to 16 attended Modern Dance classes.

Word Count: 161

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

classes: 6

chart: 5

attended: 5

studios: 4

dance: 3

young: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by providing an overview and key features of both charts. It correctly identifies the main trends and makes relevant comparisons. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data (e.g., the number of ballet students under 11 is stated as approximately 600, but the visual description indicates around 275) and some omissions (e.g., specific figures for tap and modern classes). To improve, ensure data is accurately reported and include more specific details for all categories, while maintaining a clear and concise structure.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, an overview, and separate paragraphs for the pie chart and bar chart. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and a few unclear references (e.g., 'Community Hall and Others came up as the second least' is confusing). The overview could be more concise and better integrated. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and use cohesive devices more effectively to link sentences and ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally appropriate for the task, with some good attempts at paraphrasing (e.g., 'dominated by', 'ranging from'). However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward expressions (e.g., 'makes up for almost half' should be 'makes up almost half', 'came up as the second least' is unnatural). To improve, use a wider range of precise vocabulary and ensure collocations are correct. Also, avoid repetition of 'attended' and 'classes'. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a mix of simple and complex structures, but there are several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For example, 'Private Studios makes up' should be 'Private Studios make up', and 'the whole pie chart' is redundant. Also, the sentence 'The bar chart clarifies most children under 11 attended Ballet classes with approximately 600 students' is awkward and could be rephrased. To improve, proofread for subject-verb agreement, use articles correctly, and vary sentence structures more.

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