Bar Chart

Band 4+: The chart below shows the percentage of men and women who did various free-time activities in England.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the percentage of men and women who did various free-time activities in England.

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The image displays a horizontal bar graph showing percentages of men and women engaged in various activities: Watching TV - Women 80%, Men 78%; Spending time with family - Women 70%, Men 61%; Shopping - Women 65%, Men 40%; Doing sport/exercise - Women 20%, Men 45%; Reading - Women 50%, Men 30%; Using the Internet - Women 40%, Men 60%; Playing computer games - Women 12%, Men 35%.

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The chart illustrates the proportion of females and males who participated in different leisure activities in England.

Overall, it is clear that watching TV and spending time with family were popular, while playing computer games the least popular. Women were more likely to shop and spend time with family. In everything else, men were more likely to participate.

As for watching TV, was dominant. A vast majority of 80% agreed with that. When it comes to women, as many as 75% watched TV. In terms of spending time with family, it was also similar to watching TV for men and women were same percentages around 76% and 77%. Regarding Shoping, the porportions of women around 74% higher than men. men rate about 30%.

Word Count: 123

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

women: 4

watching: 3

family: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies and irrelevant information. The data is misinterpreted, leading to incorrect percentages and comparisons. The writing also suffers from grammatical errors and a lack of clarity. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data from the chart, using precise language, and ensuring grammatical correctness. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear paragraphing and logical flow. The ideas are not well-organized, and the transitions between sentences and paragraphs are abrupt. For instance, the sudden shift from general observations to specific activities without clear connectors makes the report difficult to follow. Improve coherence by using transition words and phrases to link ideas and ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-defined aspect of the data.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive. There is limited use of varied language to describe the data. For example, the report uses phrases like 'were popular' and 'more likely to participate' without exploring synonyms or more descriptive alternatives. Enhance lexical resource by incorporating a wider range of vocabulary related to proportions, preferences, and activities. Use more precise language to describe the data and avoid repetition.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, incorrect use of articles, and awkward phrasing. For example, 'When it comes to women, as many as 75% watched TV' contains awkward phrasing and an inaccurate percentage. Improve grammatical accuracy by carefully proofreading the report for errors and focusing on correct sentence structure and verb tenses. Practice using a variety of sentence structures to enhance grammatical range.

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