Bar Chart

Band 6+: The chart below shows the proportion of male and female students studying six art-related subjects at a UK university in 2011. summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the proportion of male and female students studying six art-related subjects at a UK university in 2011. summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image is a stacked bar chart titled 'Art Students by Gender (2011)', which displays the percentage of male and female students across six subjects. For Fine Arts, the distribution is 30% male and 70% female. In Music, it is 40% male and 60% female. Graphic Design has 55% male and 45% female students. For Sculpture, the breakdown is 60% male and 40% female. Film Studies shows a distribution of 38% male and 62% female. Lastly, Photography is composed of 35% male and 65% female students.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart illustrates the six variety of subjects studied by male and female at a UK University in 2011. The subjects are respectively fine arts, music, graphic design, sculpture, film studies and photography.

It can be observed that females tend to study the majority of the subjects more apart from some subjects like Sculpture where male students are taking this subject by 60% whereas the female students allocate to only 40%. Furthermore, in Graphic Design subject, it can also be noticed that male students are higher by a percentage of around 55%.

However, apart from these two subjects, the female students are expected to have been taking these courses to a greater extent. Female students are seen to conquer the course of Fine Arts where they occupy the class around 70%. Hence, in most of the cources, the female students are reportedly enrolled in the courses.

Word Count: 146

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

students: 6

subjects: 5

female: 5

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by summarizing the main features of the chart and making relevant comparisons. The organization is clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs focusing on key observations, and a concluding statement. To improve, provide more specific data and avoid generalizations. For example, instead of saying 'females tend to study the majority of the subjects more,' quantify this with specific subject names and percentages. Also, ensure consistent and accurate use of language throughout the report. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a general overview of the data but lacks a clear structure and flow. The ideas are not always logically connected, and the paragraphing could be improved to enhance readability. Consider using more cohesive devices to link sentences and paragraphs, and ensure each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the data.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate but could be more precise and varied. There are instances of imprecise word choice (e.g., 'six variety of subjects,' 'taking this subject'). Expanding your vocabulary and using more specific terms would improve the clarity and impact of your writing. For example, instead of 'taking this subject,' you could say 'enrolled in sculpture.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include incorrect verb forms ('females tend to study the majority of the subjects more'), awkward phrasing ('the female students are expected to have been taking these courses'), and issues with articles and prepositions. Focus on improving your grammatical accuracy by reviewing basic grammar rules and proofreading carefully. Varying sentence structure would also enhance the overall quality of your writing.

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