Pie Chart

Band 5+: The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

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The image shows a pie chart with the following data: Service Industries 33%, Manufacturing Industry 16.3%, Education 14.7%, Politics and Government 12.1%, Arts/Entertainment/Media 7.8%, Science and Technology 7.3%, Civil Service 5.6%, Other 2.8%, Charity 0.3%, Sport 0.1%.

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The pie chart depicts the ratio of graduates students from BlueSky University in 2006 who was going into various employment departments.

Overall, it was clearly seen that , the highest percentage of service industries is 33 % . While in Other, Sport and a Charity sectors lowest students can take interest.

In the graph , a sunstanticial amount of students can take an admission in Service industries which is 33% and it was a highest ratio. While Manufacturing industry, politics ans government had a average students can take admission and their ratio was 16.3 % and 12.1 % , respectively. If we see in science and technology department and arts, entertainment and media section thier both percentage was almost like nearly 7.3% and 7.8% , respectively.

In civil service sector only 5.6% graduates can get admission and in Other sector 2.8% students shows involvement . While in charity and sports sections reveals only 0.3% and 0.1% ratio students can take part which is the lowest ratio of interest.

Word Count: 168

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

students: 6

ratio: 5

service: 3

while: 3

admission: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are some issues with organization and accuracy. The overview is present but could be more concise and impactful. The body paragraphs present data, but the analysis lacks depth and clarity. There are also some language errors that affect readability. To improve, focus on structuring the report more logically, providing more specific comparisons and contrasts, and ensuring grammatical accuracy.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The sentences are not well-connected, making it difficult to follow the information. Paragraphing is present but doesn't effectively separate ideas. Use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas and create a smoother flow. For example, use transition words and phrases to show relationships between different sectors and their proportions.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There is some repetition of words and phrases. Expand your vocabulary related to proportions, employment sectors, and data analysis. Use synonyms and varied language to describe the data more accurately and avoid repetition. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'ratio,' try 'proportion,' 'percentage,' or 'share.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect use of articles and prepositions. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors. Consider using a grammar checker to help identify areas for improvement.

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Band 5+: The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from BlueSky University in 2006 entering different employment sectors.

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Check Your Answer On This Topic?

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