Bar Chart

Band 6+: the chart shows british emigration to selected destination between 2004 and 2007.

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The image displays British emigration to Australia, Spain, New Zealand, USA, and France between 2004 and 2007, in thousands. In 2004: Australia 39, Spain 35, New Zealand 22, USA 23, France 21; in 2005: Australia 39, Spain 33, New Zealand 21, USA 19, France 19; in 2006: Australia 51, Spain 32, New Zealand 21, USA 21, France 18; in 2007: Australia 43, Spain 28, New Zealand 20, USA 20, France 18.

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The following bar graph illustrates the number of british emigrants to various destinations like Australia, Spain, New Zealand, USA, France between the years 2004 to 2007 .

Overall, the highest number of emigration took place in the year 2006 in Australia around 52 thousand emigrations and the least number was in 2005 USA around 18 thousand only.

Australia has good number of british emigrants in all the years where the least number occured in 2005 around 38 thousand only . Followed by Spain where in both 2004 and 2005 the number remained the same around 34 thousand emigrants. However, France had numerous fluctuations in the count of people over the years but 2005 remained the highest around 32 thousand emigrants and the least number was in 2007 around 18 thousand emigrations.

Both the countries USA and New Zealand had almost the same frequency of emigrations in the four years throughout .

Word Count: 151

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

number: 7

around: 6

thousand: 6

emigrants: 4

years: 4

least: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task but contains some inaccuracies and omissions. The overview is acceptable, but the body paragraphs include some incorrect data and generalizations. For example, the report states that France had the highest number of emigrants in 2005, which is not supported by the data. Also, the report mentions fluctuations in France's emigration numbers but doesn't accurately describe the trend. To improve, ensure data accuracy and provide more specific details about trends and comparisons.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow could be improved. The overall trends are identified, but the connections between sentences and paragraphs are not always clear, leading to some choppiness. Consider using transition words and phrases to link ideas more effectively and create a smoother narrative. For example, in the third paragraph, the shift from Australia to Spain and then to France feels abrupt. Adding phrases like 'In contrast' or 'Similarly' could help. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, clear idea.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. The report relies on basic terms like 'number,' 'highest,' and 'least.' Try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to trends and comparisons, such as 'peaked,' 'fluctuated,' 'remained stable,' or 'experienced a decline.' This would enhance the sophistication of the writing. Also, be careful with word choice; for example, 'frequency of emigrations' could be rephrased for better clarity and impact.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Sentence structure is often simple, and there are issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and article usage. For example, 'Australia has good number of british emigrants' should be revised to 'Australia had a significant number of British emigrants.' Similarly, 'the least number occured' should be 'the least number occurred.' Pay close attention to proofreading for these types of errors. Varying sentence structure and using a wider range of grammatical structures would also improve the overall quality.

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Band 6+: the chart shows british emigration to selected destination between 2004 and 2007.

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Answers On The Same Topic:

the chart shows british emigration to selected destination between 2004 and 2007.

the chart shows british emigration to selected destination between 2004 and 2007.

the chart shows british emigration to selected destination between 2004 and 2007.

the chart shows british emigration to selected destination between 2004 and 2007.

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