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Band 4+: The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

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Image for topic: The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

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The image displays two pie charts comparing the percentage of electricity consumption by different sectors in Eastern Australia for the years 2007 and 2010. In 2007: Residential 28%, Commercial 23%, Aluminum 13%, Manufacturing 13%, Other metals 12%, Mining 9%, and Agriculture 1%. In 2010: Residential 28%, Commercial 23%, Other metals 18%, Transport 11%, Aluminum 11%, Mining 9%, Manufacturing 9%, and Agriculture 1%.

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It is exhibited from the given two pie charts comparison between the ratio of the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

At a glance, it is appearent that the most electricity used in residential sector in 2007, Similarly residential is in same percentage in 2010. Moreover, both year resindential recorded the top rate which is more than a quarter (28%).

To commence, residential plays a dominant role, contributing 28%- exactly the double the share of manufacturing which is stands at 12.70%. This significant gap highlights in 2010 residential in a leading position accounting for 30%, compared to other metals which is 18.30%.

In contrast, Agricultural contribute moderately to lowest sector accounting 0.80% of electricity in both year 2007 and 2010. In 2009 steadily increased Transport (1%) showing a relatively small difference between the two. As for the year 2010, manufacturing is just 8.50%.

Word Count: 151

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

residential: 4

electricity: 3

which: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task and identifies some key trends, such as the dominance of the residential sector and the low consumption in agriculture. However, there are significant issues with data accuracy and consistency. The report includes figures (e.g., 12.70%, 30%, 18.30%, 0.80%, 1%) that do not align with the provided visual description, and it mentions a year (2009) that is not present in the charts. Additionally, the overview is somewhat repetitive, and the mathematical comparisons (e.g., 'exactly the double') are inaccurate based on the data provided. To improve, ensure that all cited statistics strictly match the visual data and focus on grouping information logically to highlight clear comparisons between the two years.

Coherence & Cohesion

The organization of ideas is somewhat disjointed, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logical progression of the comparison. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices (e.g., 'At a glance', 'To commence', 'In contrast'), they are often used incorrectly or do not logically link the sentences. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that transitions between sentences flow naturally. Avoid starting paragraphs with phrases like 'To commence' unless you are describing a chronological process; for data comparison, use transitions that highlight similarities or differences.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is limited and often repetitive or inaccurately applied. There are several instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'the ratio of the percentage' and 'residential is in same percentage', which lack the precision required for academic writing. Additionally, there are spelling errors (e.g., 'appearent', 'resindential'). To improve, focus on learning specific collocations for data description (e.g., 'accounted for', 'represented', 'constituted') and ensure that word choices accurately reflect the mathematical relationships being described.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and significantly impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'Agricultural contribute'), sentence structure (e.g., 'which is stands at'), and tense consistency. Some sentences are fragmented or contain run-on structures that make the meaning unclear. To improve, practice constructing simple and complex sentences with correct verb forms and prepositions. Pay close attention to how relative clauses (using 'which' or 'where') are integrated into sentences to avoid grammatical fragments.

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Band 4+: The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

Other Topics:

The diagrams below contain information regarding percentages of people occupied in various types of position in 1998 and 2001.

The charts show information about the number of kilometre travelled in an average month and the distribution of vehicle types in Britain

The first chart below shows information about the consumers of water in Australia in 2004. The second chart gives details of essential water use in Australia in the same year

The following two pie charts display the results of a survey into the popularity of various leisure activities among European adults in 1985 and 1995. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 word

Task 1: The charts show how satisfied students were with several types of facilities at a university in the UK in the year 2007. Provide an overview of the information by identifying and describing the key details, and include comparisons where appropriate.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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