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Band 7+: The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

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Image for topic: The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

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The image displays two pie charts comparing the percentage of electricity consumption by different sectors in Eastern Australia for the years 2007 and 2010. In 2007: Residential 28%, Commercial 23%, Aluminum 13%, Manufacturing 13%, Other metals 12%, Mining 9%, and Agriculture 1%. In 2010: Residential 28%, Commercial 23%, Other metals 18%, Transport 11%, Aluminum 11%, Mining 9%, Manufacturing 9%, and Agriculture 1%.

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The pie chart illustrates the proportion of electricity consumption in different sectors in Eastern Australia between 2007 and 2010.

Overall, from 2007 to 2010, the percentage of electricity used by transport, residential, commercial and agriculture were unchanged. Moreover, residential and commercial accounted for the highest percentage while the figure for transport and agriculture remained the lowest.

Regarding aluminum, the proportion of electricity consumed in Eastern Australia experienced a slight decrease from 13% in 2007 to 11% in 2010. Similarly, that of manufacturing dropped considerably from 13% to 9%. In contrast, the figure for other metals witnessed a significant increase from 12% to 18%.

Turning to the remaining sectors, the proportion of those remained stable throughout the period. Notably, the figure for residential and commercial were the main electricity consumption in both years, at 28% and 23%, respectively. Moreover, the amount electricity consumed by transport and agriculture were the same, at 1%, which accounted for the lowest, while mining made up to 9%.

Word Count: 162

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

electricity: 5

proportion: 3

transport: 3

residential: 3

commercial: 3

agriculture: 3

figure: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main features of the charts and provides a clear overview of the trends. The comparison between the two years is logical, and the grouping of data is effective. However, there is a factual inaccuracy regarding the 'Transport' sector; the report states it remained unchanged at 1%, whereas the data indicates it was a new or different figure in 2010 (11%). To improve, ensure that all data points are cross-checked against the visual information to avoid misrepresenting the trends of specific categories. Additionally, refining grammatical precision in phrases like 'the proportion of those remained stable' would enhance the overall quality.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is logically organized with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. The use of cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'Regarding', 'Similarly', and 'In contrast' helps guide the reader through the comparisons. However, there is some repetition in how information is grouped, and the transition between the overview and the details could be smoother. To improve, ensure that the grouping of information in the body paragraphs follows a more distinct logical pattern (e.g., grouping by trends rather than just listing sectors).

Lexical Resource

The candidate uses a variety of vocabulary to describe changes, such as 'experienced a slight decrease', 'dropped considerably', and 'witnessed a significant increase'. There is an attempt to use synonyms for 'percentage' and 'proportion'. To reach a higher band, avoid repetitive phrasing like 'the figure for' and 'the proportion of'. Additionally, ensure that nouns and verbs are used with precision; for example, saying 'residential and commercial were the main electricity consumption' is slightly awkward - it would be better to say they 'accounted for the largest share of electricity consumption'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical inaccuracies that affect the flow. Specifically, there are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the proportion of those remained stable' should be 'the proportion of those that remained stable' or 'the proportions of these sectors remained stable'; 'the figure for residential and commercial were' should be 'was') and article usage. There is also a minor error in 'the amount electricity consumed'. Improving accuracy in subject-verb agreement and relative clause construction will significantly boost this score.

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Band 7+: The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

The charts below show the percentage of electricity consumed by different sectors in Eastern Australia in 2007 and 2010.

Other Topics:

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The graphs below show the different reasons of two groups of students to choose Dorrifod University. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The table and chart below show the domestic water use and cost in five countries.

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Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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