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Band 5+: The charts below shows change in student enrolment by degree at a university in Canada in 1980 and 2000

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Image for topic: The charts below shows change in student enrolment by degree at a university in Canada in 1980 and 2000

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The image shows student enrollment data at a university in Canada for 1980 and 2000; 1980 enrollment: Bachelor's degree 76%, Master's degree 9%, Associate degree 13%, Doctoral degree 2%; 2000 enrollment: Bachelor's degree 42%, Master's degree 35%, Associate degree 18%, Doctoral degree 5%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given pie charts illustrate the change in enrolment in Canadian university of the attending students by their degree in the years 1980 and 2000.

Overall, Bachelor’s degree in both years given remained the most enrolled among the students.By contrast, the least amount of people has attended the doctoral degree in both years, while Associate had some increasements.Furthermore, the percentage for Master’s degree had skyrocketed in th period given.

From having 76% in 1980, student enrolment for Bachelor’s degree had experienced a downward trend for almost 30% in 2000, but still remaining the lead position.Whereas, with the lowest enrolment, the percentage of students in Doctoral degree had risen for 3% by 2000.

The number of students in Associate degree was 13% and 15 % in the years 1980 and 2000 respectively, rising for by 3%. Seeing the biggest change, attendings of Master’s degree, the percentage of enrolment has risen by almost 4 times in 2000.

Word Count: 155

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

degree: 8

enrolment: 4

years: 4

students: 3

percentage: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by summarizing the information presented in the pie charts. The overview is clear, and the main features of the data are identified. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., Associate degree percentages). To improve, ensure all data points are accurately represented and consider grouping information more effectively to enhance clarity and conciseness.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize information, but the flow could be improved. The overall structure is present, but the connection between sentences and paragraphs needs strengthening to ensure a smoother transition for the reader. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the logical progression of information.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the information, but there are instances where word choice could be more precise. For example, 'increasements' is not a standard word. Focus on using more accurate and sophisticated vocabulary to describe trends and changes. Expanding your vocabulary related to data analysis and comparison would be beneficial.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are noticeable and impact clarity. Errors such as subject-verb agreement issues ('people has attended') and incorrect preposition usage ('rising for by 3%') need to be addressed. Proofreading carefully and focusing on accurate sentence construction will improve the grammatical accuracy of your writing.

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