Line Graph

Band 6+: The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The graph below describes the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet between 1994 and 2005 in China. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a line graph showing the number of people (in millions) using three different communication methods from 1994 to 2005. For Fixed telephone lines, the user numbers were: 1994 (20), 1995 (50), 1996 (80), 1997 (120), 1998 (150), 1999 (175), 2000 (200), 2001 (250), 2002 (275), 2003 (300), 2004 (320), and 2005 (350). For Mobile phones, the numbers started in 1996 at 25, followed by: 1997 (50), 1998 (115), 1999 (140), 2000 (165), 2001 (250), 2002 (300), 2003 (350), 2004 (400), and 2005 (450). For the Internet, the data began in 1995 at 5, and continued as: 1996 (10), 1997 (50), 1998 (75), 1999 (100), 2000 (110), 2001 (125), 2002 (150), 2003 (160), 2004 (170), and 2005 (185).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line graph provide information about the use of fixed telephone lines, mobile phones, and internet from 1994 to 2005 in China.

Overall, it is obvious that all the figures experienced transformation albeit to various degrees. It is also worth mentioning that mobile phone usage gained the dominance over the course of the period.

Turning to the figures for mobile phone and fixed telephone line, initially the figure of former one stood at 0 million people, while the corresponding figure for the latter was around 20 million people in 1994. Similarly, fixed telephone line started to increase and reached to 200 million people by 2000 while the number of mobile phone users went up to roughly 170 million. In 2005, fixed telephone line gained 350 million people whereas the mobile phone dramatically rise to 450 million people which is the highest figure recorded in the graph throughout the given period.

Regarding the figure for internet, it gained the lowest position in the graph despite exhibiting moderate increase as the period drew to a close. During 3 years it stayed with 0 people in using internet. However, by 1997 it amounted to 50 million people and it started to rise to 150 million users by 2002. In 2005, the number of people climbed to almost 200 million with postioning the third rank in the graph.

Word Count: 224

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

million: 9

people: 8

mobile: 5

graph: 4

fixed: 4

telephone: 4

phone: 4

figure: 4

internet: 3

gained: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by identifying the main trends and comparing the three categories of communication methods. The overview is clear and highlights the most significant trend (the dominance of mobile phones). To improve, ensure more precise data comparisons; for instance, the report mentions mobile phone usage was 0 in 1994, which is a reasonable inference but could be phrased more carefully as 'not recorded' or 'negligible'. Additionally, while the trends are well-described, incorporating more varied comparative structures and ensuring grammatical accuracy in verb tenses (e.g., 'mobile phone dramatically rise' should be 'rose') would elevate the quality of the response.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and imprecise cohesive devices. For example, the use of 'the former one' and 'the latter' is attempted but lacks the necessary precision to ensure effortless reading. To improve, focus on using more natural transitions and ensuring that your referencing (using pronouns or synonyms to refer back to previous subjects) is clear and unambiguous.

Lexical Resource

You have used a range of vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'experienced transformation', 'gained the dominance', and 'exhibiting moderate increase'. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations (e.g., 'gained the dominance', 'stayed with 0 people in using internet', 'positioning the third rank'). To reach a higher band, aim for more natural academic collocations and avoid repetitive structures. Instead of 'gained 350 million people', use 'the number of users reached 350 million'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates some ability to use complex structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('the line graph provide'), incorrect preposition usage ('reached to'), and tense inconsistencies ('mobile phone dramatically rise'). There are also errors in article usage and sentence construction. To improve, pay close attention to verb tenses when describing historical data and ensure that your subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout the text.

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