Line Graph

Band 5+: The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image presents a line graph detailing shop closures and openings from 2011-2018: 2011: closures ~6,800, openings ~8,500; 2012: closures ~7,000, openings ~4,500; 2013: closures ~6,500, openings ~5,000; 2014: closures ~6,800, openings ~4,000; 2015: closures ~5,000, openings ~5,500; 2016: closures ~7,000, openings exactly 4,000; 2017: closures and openings both at 4,000; 2018: closures ~3,000, openings ~3,500.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The line graph illustrates the amount of stores that closed and the amount of new stores that opened in a country around 2011 and 2018.

Overall, there was a fluctuation for the opening stores with a decreased trend. On the other hand, there was a remain steady trend with one rocket drop on one year for the closures stores. Approximately, the number of store closures exceeded the number of store openings.

Between 2011- 2014, the store closures remained stable at the starting point in around 6,400 stores and reached its peak around 7,100 stores in 2013. However, the store openings started as a peak state with around 8,500 stores opened in 2011 and having a massive drop until it reached to 4,000 stores in 2012. In 2014-2015, there was a extremely rocket drop from around 6,500 to around 600 store closures. At the same time, the number of store openings had a little decreased from around 6,100 stores in 2014 to 4,000 stores in 2015.

After an enormous drop in 2015, the store closures trend began to rise again until it reached around 5,100 store openings in 2016 and remained stable until 2018. Along with that, the store openings remained stable between 2015 and 2017 until it decreased to 3,000 stores in 2018.

Word Count: 213

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

stores: 11

store: 9

around: 8

closures: 5

openings: 4

until: 4

there: 3

decreased: 3

trend: 3

number: 3

remained: 3

stable: 3

reached: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task and identifies some key trends, but there are significant issues with data accuracy and clarity that hinder the overall achievement. There are several instances where the reported figures contradict the visual description (for example, stating closures dropped to 600 in 2015, or misidentifying which data line is being discussed in the final paragraph). Additionally, the use of certain phrases like 'rocket drop' is non-standard and imprecise for academic writing. To improve, focus on ensuring that the data points mentioned strictly align with the graph and use more formal vocabulary to describe trends (e.g., 'sharp decline' instead of 'rocket drop'). Ensure that comparisons between the two categories are clear and consistent throughout the report.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report attempts to organize information chronologically, but the progression of ideas is often interrupted by confusing phrasing. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive or used incorrectly (e.g., 'Along with that', 'At the same time'), which can make the logical flow difficult to follow. To improve, focus on using more precise transitional phrases and ensure that each paragraph has a clear, singular purpose (e.g., one paragraph for openings and one for closures, or one for the first half of the period and one for the second).

Lexical Resource

There is an attempt to use varied vocabulary to describe trends (e.g., 'fluctuation', 'peak', 'massive drop'), but many word choices are unnatural or used incorrectly. Phrases like 'rocket drop', 'remain steady trend', and 'peak state' are not standard English collocations for describing data. Additionally, the word 'amount' is used for countable nouns (stores); 'number' should be used instead. Aim to learn standard academic collocations for trend descriptions, such as 'a significant decline' or 'remained relatively stable'. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage (e.g., 'a extremely rocket drop'), and prepositional errors. Sentence structures are often awkward, such as 'the store closures trend began to rise again until it reached around 5,100 store openings in 2016' (which confuses the subject of the sentence). Work on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring that the subject of your sentence clearly matches the data you are describing.

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