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Band 5+: The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

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The image charts the percentage of the population aged 65 and older spanning ninety years (1940-2040) in Japan, Sweden, and the USA. Japan's population aged 65+ started at 5% in 1940, hit 10% by 1990, and is projected to reach 30% by 2040. Sweden's proportion began at 7% in 1940, reaching 17% by 1990, and anticipating 25% by 2040. The USA's percentage commenced at 8% in 1940, achieving 13% by 1990, and expecting to hit nearly 23% by 2040.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given line graph depicts how the percentage of people aged changed during the period from 1940 to 2040.

Overall, the three regions experienced different trends during the time period. It is clear that Sweden and Japan recorded a steady increase over the period. Additionally, a figure like America fluctuated before stabilizing toward the end of the period.

As the graph shows, after starting at approximately 9 percent, the USA’s percentage of aged people rose sharply and reached around 15% within a short period in 1960. It slightly declined to 1% over the period between 1980 and 2010. Then, the figure continues to rise in 2040. Regarding Japan, in 1940, it stood at 5% of aged people. This figure moderately dropped 3% in 1960, then it levelled off and remained relatively stable for the restin 1980. Afterward, the line will sharply shoot up to 27% in 2040.

Sweden’s percentage fluctuated during the period, rising and falling times before ending at around 25%

Word Count: 162

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

period: 6

percentage: 3

people: 3

during: 3

figure: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies in data interpretation that affect the overall clarity. While the overview identifies general trends, the specific details provided for the USA and Japan contradict the visual description (for example, stating the USA declined to 1% or that Japan's population dropped in 1960). Additionally, the description of Sweden is too brief and lacks the necessary detail to be considered a complete summary. To improve, ensure that the trends described (increases, decreases, or stability) accurately reflect the data points provided, and aim for a more balanced distribution of detail across all three categories.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a basic structure, but the progression of ideas is somewhat disjointed. While there is an attempt at an overview, the logical connection between sentences could be improved. The use of cohesive devices is limited, and some transitions feel abrupt. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and use a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'In contrast,' 'Subsequently,' 'Following this') to guide the reader through the comparisons.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat repetitive and, in some instances, imprecise. For example, phrases like 'a figure like America' are informal and not suitable for academic writing. There are also errors in word formation and usage, such as 'the restin 1980' and 'rising and falling times.' Aim to use more sophisticated academic collocations and ensure that your word choices accurately reflect the data trends (e.g., instead of 'shoot up,' use 'surge' or 'increase significantly').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical accuracy is a significant issue in this report. There are several errors in tense usage, particularly when switching between describing historical data and future projections. For instance, the report mixes past and present tenses inconsistently. Additionally, there are errors in sentence structure and preposition usage. To improve, focus on mastering the use of future forms (e.g., 'is projected to,' 'is expected to') for future data and ensure subject-verb agreement is maintained throughout.

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Band 5+: The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

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Answers On The Same Topic:

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

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