Bar Chart

Band 5+: The Graph shows the number of boys and girls playing sport in an English town in 2012.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The Graph shows the number of boys and girls playing sport in an English town in 2012.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image presents a graph detailing sports participation figures for boys and girls in an English town from 2012 across six sports: Tennis records 35 boys and 25 girls; Badminton has 40 boys and 20 girls; Cycling shows 30 boys and 20 girls; Swimming indicates 50 boys and 40 girls; Football displays 60 boys and 40 girls; Hockey registers 10 boys and 10 girls.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The graph ilustrates the percentage of boys and girls who doing sport in an English town in 2012.

Overall, it is clear that the boys choosen football as an the most populer to do. In addition, swimming had been the most sport which did by the girls. Whereas hocky was the lower interested by the both of them.

In detail, the data of sport did by boys showing football accounted for 60 that makes as the higher sport for boys. Moreover, tennis (50), swimming (40), cycling (35), and badminton (30) became the second choice sports which did by boys other than footbaal with not too long comparing by data. Hocky became the lowest sport which did by boys by 15.

In contrast, the data of sport did by girls demonstrate swimming accounted for 50 that makes as the higher sport for girls. Futhermore, badminton (40), tennis (35), football (25), and cycling (20) became the second choice sports which did by girls other than swimming. Hocky has the lowest sport which did by girls by 10.

Word Count: 175

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sport: 8

girls: 6

which: 5

swimming: 4

football: 3

hocky: 3

became: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task by summarizing the main features of the graph and making some comparisons. However, there are inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., tennis (50) for boys, badminton (40) for girls), and the writing contains grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. To improve, focus on accurately reporting the data, using precise language, and ensuring grammatical correctness. Also, consider organizing the information more effectively, perhaps by grouping sports with similar participation rates or highlighting key differences between boys' and girls' participation.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize information into paragraphs, but the flow of ideas is somewhat disjointed. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs could be improved to enhance coherence. For example, using transition words like 'However,' 'Similarly,' or 'In conclusion' can help guide the reader through the information. The organization of details within each paragraph could also be more structured to improve clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, which limits the report's ability to convey the information effectively. There are instances of incorrect word usage ('choosen,' 'populer,' 'lower interested'). To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary related to describing data and trends. Use synonyms to avoid repetition and aim for more precise language. For example, instead of 'makes as the higher sport,' consider 'is the most popular sport.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses ('who doing sport,' 'had been the most sport which did'), subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect article usage ('an the most populer'). Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. To improve, focus on mastering basic grammar rules and sentence structures. Practice writing simple sentences and gradually incorporate more complex structures as your accuracy improves. Proofread carefully for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage.

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