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Band 5+: The graph shows the percentage of people participating in outdoor activities in Australia between 1997 and 2007.

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Image for topic: The graph shows the percentage of people participating in outdoor activities in Australia between 1997 and 2007.

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The image presents the percentage of Australians participating in various outdoor activities over the years 1997, 2001, and 2007, where picnicking: 60%, 65%, 55%; walking: 45%, 52%, 40%; camping: 25%, 30%, 28%; horse riding: 6%, 7%, 6%; cycling: 15%, 20%, 18%; water activities: 50%, 58%, 50%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The presented line graph illustrates a percentage of Australians that choose to do the outdoor activities. The graph presents the statistics for camping, cycling and horse riding between 1997 and 2007.

The most popular activity out of three was camping. It peaked in the middle at nearly a third of Australians participating in camping. Cycling came closely behind throughout the decade and gone up to the same number in the end. On the other hand, horse riding remained steady throughout the decade and stayed at around 4 percent.

Overall, the number of Australians that chose to do camping and cycling steadily rose in popularity. On the contrary, the horse riding remained quite unpopular activity among Australians.

Word Count: 116

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

australians: 4

camping: 4

cycling: 3

horse: 3

riding: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task by focusing on the specified activities (camping, cycling, and horse riding) and identifying main trends. However, there's room for improvement in providing more specific data points and comparisons. To enhance the response, include more precise figures to support your observations and consider expanding on the reasons behind the trends, if possible, to provide a more comprehensive analysis. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally coherent, but the organization could be improved. Consider grouping similar trends together and using more varied transition words to enhance the flow between sentences and paragraphs. For example, you could combine the discussion of camping and cycling in one paragraph since they both show an increase in popularity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but could be more varied and precise. Instead of repeatedly using phrases like 'the number of Australians,' try using synonyms or rephrasing the sentences. Also, consider using more specific vocabulary related to trends, such as 'fluctuated,' 'plateaued,' or 'experienced a slight dip.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains some grammatical errors and phrasing issues that affect clarity. For example, 'gone up to the same number in the end' is not grammatically correct. Aim for more complex sentence structures and ensure correct verb tense usage. Proofread carefully to eliminate such errors.

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