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Band 5+: The line graphs shows the number of annual visits to Australia by overseas residents. The table gives information on the country of origin where the visitors came from.

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The image shows a line graph and a table detailing the number of overseas residents' annual visits to Australia. Line graph data: 1975: 10 million, 1985: 15 million, 1995: 25 million, 2005: 30 million. Table of visitors (million) 1975/2005: South Korea 2.9/9.1, Japan 3.2/12.0, China 0.3/0.8, USA 0.4/1.1, Britain 0.9/2.9, Europe 1.1/4.5, Total 8.8/30.4.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given line graph illustrates the amount of visits for the first time to Australia by foreign individuals.The given table informs about from where visitors came from.

Overall, it can be seen that trips to the Australia were increased after each decade, from 1975 to 2005.Total number of travelers was also more in 2005, comparing to 1975. Most of the visitors were originally from Japan, while the least visitors came from China.

In 1975, the number of journeys to the Australia was only about 10 millions. After that, it went up and accounted for approximately 15 millions, rising for 5 millions visits in 1985. Subsequently, the amount of trips never stopped an incline and made up 25 million visits in 1995. After a decade, it increased for 5 million travels again and constituted about 30 millions. All visitors, in total, was less in 1975, making up only 8,8 million visitors from around the world. In 2005, there were quite more amount of humans and constituted 30,4 millions of travellers, comparing to previous decades. Japan remained as a country with the most travellers, making up 3,2 ans 12,0 millions of visitors in both years, respectively.Despite sizable number of citizens in China, suprisingly, this country was considered as a country with the least visitors.Only 0,3 millions of individuals came from this large country and number of visits had a slightly increase, making up 0,8 millions.

Word Count: 233

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

millions: 8

visitors: 6

visits: 4

number: 4

country: 4

amount: 3

australia: 3

about: 3

after: 3

million: 3

making: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the requirements of the task, providing a general overview of the trends in the line graph and key details from the table. There is a clear attempt to compare and contrast the data, highlighting overall increases and specific countries of origin. To improve, focus on providing more precise data references and ensuring that all significant aspects of the data are covered. Also, pay attention to language accuracy and variety to enhance the clarity and impact of the report.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate arrangement of information, generally presenting the data in a logical sequence. However, the flow could be improved with more effective use of cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs. Consider using a wider range of transition words and phrases to clarify the relationships between different points and ensure a smoother reading experience. Paragraphing is generally acceptable, but could be refined to better group related information and enhance overall coherence.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to convey the main points of the data. However, there are instances where the word choice could be more precise and sophisticated. To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary related to describing trends and comparisons, and practice using synonyms to avoid repetition. Additionally, pay attention to the appropriate use of collocations to enhance the naturalness of your writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, with a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are noticeable grammatical errors and phrasing issues that affect clarity. To enhance grammatical accuracy, carefully review your work for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Additionally, focus on improving sentence structure to ensure that your writing is clear and concise.

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