Pie Chart

Band 7+: The pie charts show the electricity generated in Germany and France from all sources and renewables in the year 2009. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

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Image for topic: The pie charts show the electricity generated in Germany and France from all sources and renewables in the year 2009. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

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The image shows two sets of pie charts about electricity generation in 2009. For Germany, with a total of 560 Billion kWh, the sources were Conventional Thermal at 59.6%, Nuclear at 23.0%, and Renewables at 17.4%. The breakdown of Germany's Renewables is Wind 36.0%, Biomass 34.3%, Hydroelectric 17.7%, Solar 6.3%, and Geothermal 0.8%. For France, with a total of 510 Billion kWh, the sources were Nuclear at 76.0%, Renewables at 13.7%, and Conventional Thermal at 10.3%. The breakdown of France's Renewables is Hydroelectric 80.5%, Wind 10.9%, Biomass 8.1%, Solar 0.9%, and Geothermal 0.6%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The pie charts compare the generation of electricity in Germany and France from various sources of materials and breakdown its renewables in 2009 measured in kWh.

In general, it is clear that the electricity that produced in Germany was more diverse than in France. Moreover, Germany depended on different sources and renewables, while France relied on certain energy sources in the surveyed year.

Conventional thermal accounted for the largest source in Germany, reaching 59.6%, while this percentage in France was the lowest point, at only 10.3%. Additionally, France depended heavily on nuclear sources, reaching 76% in 2009, while this proportion represented 23% at the same year. Additionally, the percentages of renewables in Germany and France accounted for 17.4% and 13.7% respectively.

In term of renewable sources, biomass sources accounted for 8.1% in France, which was smaller five times than those in Germany. In contrast, hydroelectricity had the largest share in France, representing 80.5%, while those in Germany reached only 17.7%. Moreover, wind sources represented 36.9% in Germany and 10.5% in France. In addition, solar and geothermal accounted for the smallest proportion in both countries, reaching under 7%.

Word Count: 187

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

france: 9

germany: 8

sources: 7

while: 4

accounted: 4

renewables: 3

reaching: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by identifying the main features and making relevant comparisons between Germany and France. The overview is clear, highlighting the difference in energy diversity between the two nations. Data is reported accurately based on the provided description, and the comparison of renewable sub-sectors is well-structured. To improve, ensure more precise grammatical control in complex sentences (e.g., 'the electricity that produced' should be 'the electricity produced') and avoid repetitive use of cohesive devices like 'Additionally' and 'Moreover'.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is logically organized, moving from a general overview to specific comparisons of main energy sources and then to a detailed breakdown of renewables. The use of cohesive devices like 'In general', 'Moreover', 'Additionally', and 'In contrast' helps guide the reader. However, there is some repetitive use of transition words (e.g., using 'Additionally' twice in close succession). To improve, try to vary your linking words or integrate them more naturally into the sentence structure to avoid a mechanical feel.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally appropriate and covers the necessary terminology to describe the charts (e.g., 'accounted for', 'represented', 'proportion', 'diverse'). There are some minor phrasing issues, such as 'sources of materials' which is slightly awkward in this context, and 'smaller five times' which should be 'five times smaller'. Aim for more sophisticated collocations and ensure that comparative structures are used with precision. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are several grammatical inaccuracies that affect the flow. For example, 'the electricity that produced' should be 'the electricity produced' or 'the electricity that was produced' (passive voice). There are also issues with prepositional use and article usage (e.g., 'In term of' should be 'In terms of'). Paying closer attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct formation of passive constructions will help elevate the grammatical accuracy.

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