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Band 5+: The table below shows the average salaries of teachers in five countries at the beginning of their career, after 15 years and the maximum salary.

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The image shows a table of school teacher salaries in 2016 with starting salary (USD per annum), salary after 15 years (USD per annum), maximum salary (USD per annum), and years to achieve maximum salary for five countries: Australia - 22,235 starting, 69,638 after 15 years, 77,180 maximum, 19 years; Belgium - 15,186 starting, 27,528 after 15 years, 35,021 maximum, 25 years; Denmark - 31,745 starting, 58,142 after 15 years, 63,395 maximum, 30 years; Japan - 38,345 starting, 55,015 after 15 years, 68,175 maximum, 27 years; Portugal - 17,186 starting, 23,942 after 15 years, 32,493 maximum, 22 years.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table compares the average incomes of employees until reaching the peak salary, measured in US dollars, in five different nations namely Australia, Denmark, Luxembourg, Japan and Korea.

Overall, although Australia and Denmark achieve the maximum incomes faster than the other countries, they provide relatively lowest incomes levels; additionally, Luxembourg stands out from the table with the highest salaries across five nations.

The salaries which employees in Australia and Denmark were paid for witnessed a rise in a short time. After 9 years, the average income in Australia increased 20,000 US dollars, which reached the peak salary of 48,000. Followed by Denmark, which showed a moderate rise in the salary to 54,000 US dollars in an earlier year than Australia. That said, both countries still illustrated the relatively lowest growth among the others

Regarding the remaining countries, they all had considerable growth, with the highest point recorded in Luxembourg, which took 30 years to reach the peak of salary to 132,000 US dollars. Besides, Japan’s data showed a higher amount than Korea’s in three categories, with 34,000 and 30,000 US dollars at first. After more than 30 years, both of them achieved the peak number to 86,000 and 62,000 dollars respectively.

Word Count: 201

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

dollars: 6

australia: 5

salary: 4

denmark: 4

which: 4

incomes: 3

luxembourg: 3

countries: 3

years: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies and omissions. It misidentifies the countries (e.g., Luxembourg and Korea instead of Belgium and Portugal) and provides incorrect data for several countries (e.g., Australia's starting salary and maximum salary, Denmark's figures, and the years to reach maximum salary). The overall trend is mentioned, but the specific details are largely inaccurate, which detracts from the task achievement. To improve, ensure that all countries are correctly identified and that the data presented aligns with the given information. Focus on accurately summarizing the key features and making relevant comparisons without introducing unsupported figures.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a logical structure with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, but the flow is sometimes disrupted by unclear referencing and awkward phrasing. For example, 'the salaries which employees in Australia and Denmark were paid for witnessed a rise' is confusing, and the phrase 'Followed by Denmark' is grammatically incomplete. The overview is present but could be more precise and better integrated. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that pronouns and references (e.g., 'both of them') are unambiguous. Also, avoid informal or vague expressions like 'stood out from the table' and 'illustrated the relatively lowest growth'.

Lexical Resource

The report uses some appropriate vocabulary for describing data (e.g., 'average incomes', 'peak salary', 'considerable growth'), but there are several inaccuracies and limited range. For instance, 'employees until reaching the peak salary' is awkward, and 'witnessed a rise' is overused. The phrase 'relatively lowest incomes levels' is redundant and grammatically incorrect. To improve, use a wider variety of synonyms for 'increase' (e.g., 'grew', 'rose', 'climbed') and 'salary' (e.g., 'earnings', 'remuneration'). Also, ensure that comparative structures are used accurately, such as 'higher than' and 'the highest'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains a mix of simple and complex sentences, but there are several grammatical errors and awkward constructions that affect clarity. For example, 'the salaries which employees in Australia and Denmark were paid for witnessed a rise' is grammatically incorrect, and 'which took 30 years to reach the peak of salary to 132,000' is awkward. Punctuation is mostly correct, but there are missing commas and some run-on sentences. To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct use of relative clauses, and ensure that each sentence is complete and clear. Practice using a variety of sentence structures, such as conditional and passive forms, to enhance grammatical range.

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