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Band 5+: The table below shows the worldwide market share of the mobile phone market for manufacturers in the years 2005 and 2006.

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The image presents a table of worldwide mobile phone sales expressed as percent market share for the years 2005 and 2006. In 2005: Nokia with 32.5%, Motorola with 17.7%, Samsung 12.7%, Sony Ericsson 6.3%, L.G. 6.7%, BenQ Mobile 4.9%, Others 19.2%, totaling 100%. In 2006: Nokia with 35%, Motorola with 21.1%, Samsung 11.8%, Sony Ericsson 7.4%, L.G. 6.3%, BenQ Mobile 2.4%, Others 16.2%, totaling 100%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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These table illustrates the worldwide shop distribute of the mobile phone market constructor in the years 2005 and 2006.

Overall, in 2005 Nokia has earn highest percentage in market share followed by Motorola, Samsung and others. Next year Nokia and Motorola reach up slightly, meanwhile Samsung has fell sharply and behave by others brand market. Moreover BenQ Mobile has got the lowest figures.

To begin with, Nokia in 2005 cause 32.5% that rather than Motorola around half of it. Followed by Samsung earn 12.7%, Sony Ericsson and L.G. are still similar. In 2006 Nokia and Motorola increase approximately 3% in contrasted Samsung decrease 1% by the time Sony Ericsson Increased but couldn’t replace. Furthermore others are nearly general but unsteady as Nokia.

In summary, between both two years Nokia appropriate the worldwide mobile phone market, next up with Motorola, Samsung that have higher gap and end with others that have less percent in table.

Word Count: 154

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

nokia: 5

motorola: 5

samsung: 5

market: 4

others: 4

mobile: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task, presenting the main trends and key data from the table. However, there are some areas for improvement. The language used is generally clear but contains some inaccuracies and awkward phrasing. The organization is logical, but the summary could be more concise and impactful. To improve, focus on using more precise language, varying sentence structure, and ensuring all data references are accurate. Also, consider refining the summary to highlight the most significant changes and overall trends more effectively.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but the flow of ideas could be improved. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are sometimes abrupt, affecting the overall coherence. For instance, the shift from the overview to the detailed analysis in the second and third paragraphs could be smoother. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the logical progression of information.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a range of vocabulary, but there are instances of imprecise word choice and awkward phrasing. For example, 'shop distribute' and 'reach up slightly' are not the most appropriate collocations. Expanding your vocabulary and focusing on using more precise and natural language would enhance the clarity and impact of your writing. Pay attention to using synonyms and paraphrasing to avoid repetition.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Errors include incorrect verb tenses ('Nokia has earn'), subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect preposition usage. There are also issues with sentence structure and word order. Reviewing basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction would help improve accuracy. Proofreading carefully for errors before submitting your work is also essential.

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