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Band 6+: The table shows the percentage of household with electronic goods in New Zealand in 1997 and 2002.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a table titled "Percentage of Household with Electronic Goods (%)" for the years 1997 and 2002. For Washing Machine, 1997: 97%, 2002: 97%. Video, 1997: 86%, 2002: 78%. Digital Camera, 1997: 2%, 2002: 39%. TV, 1997: 89%, 2002: 96%. Personal Computer, 1997: 46%, 2002: 90%. Dish-washing Machine, 1997: 52%, 2002: 82%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given table illustrates information about the proportion of household with electronic items in New Zealand, presenting data for six different categories across 1997 and 2002

Overall, it is evident that television was increased in almost every house in New Zealand, whereas Washing Machine showed no change during the period.

Looking at the details, Personal Computer experienced an increase from 46% to 90% in 1997 and 2002, while Video witnessed a slight decrease from 86% to 78% over the same period. In 1997, the percentage of television was 89%, morever it was increased the second highest share about 96% in 2002.

Meanwhile, Washing Machine recorded the highest value and consistent amount throughout the given period, compared with Digital Camera which was 2% in 1997, moderately increased in the percentage of 39% in 2002. On the other hand, Dish – washing Machine was hold the share about 52%, and it was added 30% round up with 82% in 2002.

Word Count: 158

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

about: 3

increased: 3

washing: 3

machine: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by presenting the main features and making relevant comparisons. The overall trend is clearly identified, and key data points are included. However, there are some minor inaccuracies and awkward phrasings (e.g., 'television was increased', 'morever', 'was hold the share', 'added 30% round up') that slightly affect clarity. To improve, focus on using precise language and ensuring grammatical accuracy. Additionally, consider structuring the report with clearer paragraphing to separate general trends from specific details.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a clear overall structure with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing (e.g., 'it was increased the second highest share'). The paragraphing is acceptable, but the logical progression within paragraphs could be improved. To enhance coherence, use clearer topic sentences and ensure each paragraph focuses on a distinct set of comparisons. Additionally, use cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a range of vocabulary related to data description (e.g., 'proportion', 'experienced an increase', 'witnessed a slight decrease', 'recorded the highest value'). However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward choices (e.g., 'was increased', 'was hold the share', 'round up'). To improve, use more precise and natural collocations (e.g., 'remained stable', 'saw a rise', 'accounted for'). Also, avoid informal phrases like 'round up' in academic writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For example, 'television was increased' should be 'television increased' or 'the percentage of households with television increased'. Also, 'morever' is misspelled, and 'Dish - washing Machine' has inconsistent hyphenation. The use of passive voice is sometimes incorrect (e.g., 'it was increased'). To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct use of tenses, and proper punctuation. Vary sentence structures to demonstrate greater grammatical range.

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