Letter

Band 7+: write a letter for school advocating for your daughter english second language learner

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Dear Mr. Ubriaco

I hope this email finds you well.

I am Lina Castillo, the mother of your 8th-grade student, Rosa Collazos. I am writing because Rosita has shared with me that she is concerned about the upcoming math test next thursday, as some unfamiliar words for her might interfere with her ability to fully understand the problem and solve the equation. She is confident about her understanding of the concepts that you have worked on in the classes, but there are some vocabs that are new for her as a learner of English as a second language.

Taking into account what I mentioned above, I respectfully advocate to provide Rosa with an aid that reduces the language gap so that she can complete her school work smoothly.

I have copied Ms. Matthew in this email because the situation could be similar in other subjects, so we can figure out a strategy that can work to meet this need in several areas.

The way that the previous school addressed this was providing Rosita with a table in the classroom, and she also used the e-translator from her cellphone to complete some activities and facilitate the communication with peers during the break if needed. However, we are open to follow the strategy that you both consider the most suitable in the current conditions.

Thank you for your assistance in this matter. I look forward to hearing from you.

Lina Castillo

Rosa´s mom

Word Count: 241

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses the task by advocating for support for the writer's daughter, who is an ESL learner. The purpose of the letter is clear, and the relevant points are sufficiently covered. To further enhance the letter, consider including specific examples of vocabulary that Rosa finds challenging in math, which would strengthen the argument for additional support. Also, while mentioning past strategies is helpful, focusing more on the specific accommodations being requested for the upcoming test could make the request more targeted and effective.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally well-organized and easy to follow. The purpose of the letter is clear from the beginning, and the progression of ideas is logical. However, consider using more varied cohesive devices to further enhance the flow and connection between sentences and paragraphs. For example, you could add transition words or phrases to signal the relationship between ideas more explicitly.

Lexical Resource

The letter demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, appropriate for the task. Terms like 'interfere,' 'equation,' 'concepts,' 'vocabs,' 'language gap,' and 'e-translator' are used effectively. To further enhance your lexical resource, consider incorporating more specific or nuanced vocabulary related to educational support and language learning. For instance, instead of 'aid,' you could use 'accommodations' or 'modifications.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar, with a variety of sentence structures used. There are a few minor errors, but they do not significantly impede understanding. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and correct tense usage. For example, in the first paragraph, consider rephrasing 'some unfamiliar words for her might interfere' to 'some unfamiliar words might interfere with her ability.' Also, ensure correct punctuation throughout the letter.

Band 7+: write a letter for school advocating for your daughter english second language learner

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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