Letter

Band 4+: WRITING TASK 1 You have recently moved to a new neighborhood and would like to join a sports center there. You have found a private sports club. Write a letter to the manager of the sports club. In your letter, introduce yourself say why are you interested in this sports club ask some questions about the club e.g. facilities, membership, costs etc.

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Dear Sir/madame

I hope my letter finds you well

I’am wraitting to you for to join your sport club

I’am Zakaria Zerargui I’am 28 years old ,I have recently moved with my familly to this new neighbourhood I’am an electrical technician in Bonatti company (Oil and gas) , and I’am old Karate Do athlete which I have trainning this sport about 15 years.

The perpose that make me choose your sport club is because it’s a big club with so much types of sports and also I hear about the karate trainner he is a famous ‘ the club is near to my house which it’s will be easy to me and my children to come everyday to trainning.

So I want to ask about the annully price, the nembership of athlets in the karate section, and the trainning programme and time.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

kind regards.

Zerargui Zakaria

Word Count: 152

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

sport: 3

karate: 3

about: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter adequately addresses the task requirements by introducing yourself, stating your interest in the sports club, and asking relevant questions. There are some minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing, but overall the letter is clear and easy to understand. To improve, focus on using more natural and varied language, and proofread carefully for errors in grammar and spelling.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat clear, but the flow could be improved. Consider using more transitional phrases to connect your ideas smoothly. For example, when transitioning from your introduction to your reasons for joining, a phrase like 'Therefore, I am particularly interested in...' would help. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main point to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to sports and club memberships to make your letter more engaging and informative. For instance, instead of 'big club,' you could say 'well-equipped club' or 'club with extensive facilities.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Focus on improving sentence structure and verb tense consistency. For example, correct 'I'am wraitting to you for to join your sport club' to 'I am writing to you to inquire about joining your sports club.' Also, pay attention to subject-verb agreement and correct use of articles (a, an, the).

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Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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