Letter

Band 5+: You are planning a team-building event for your department at work and need to make arrangements with a local adventure company. Write a letter to the adventure company outlining your needs and requesting information. You should include details about: -the number of participants and their preferences -possible dates and times for the event -catering options and costs involved.

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Dear Sir,

For the past few months I was planning to built a team for my department where I can organise to make a tour to Bhutan.

Finally, I have organised a team where every team members are physically and mentally fit for this adventure journey. The type of adventurous activities I am interested in are treking, bungee jumping and ski diving. I have communicated with each and every member of this journey about their likes and dislikes. They have also fulfilled all the medical formalities. The preferred date and time of this journey will be from 1st March to 7th March 2026. Besides the adventure there will be some site seeing places which will be covered. The number of participants are around 20-25. I will give you the exact number just a 1 week before the journey. I have collected all the medical certificates from all the participants.

I will be highly obliged if you please send the confirmation regarding this letter.

Your’s faithfully

Shouvik Nag

Word Count: 167

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

journey: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter attempts to address the task but includes irrelevant information (e.g., a tour to Bhutan, medical formalities). Key points are not clearly presented and lack the necessary detail. To improve, focus on directly addressing the requirements of the task by clearly stating the type of team-building activities, preferred date and time, and the number and fitness levels of participants.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization could be improved for clarity. The introduction lacks a clear statement of purpose, and the transition between planning a team and organizing a tour to Bhutan is abrupt. To enhance coherence, begin by directly stating the purpose of the letter - to inquire about team-building activities - and then provide details about your requirements in a logical order. Use transitional phrases to connect ideas and ensure a smooth flow of information.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate but could be more precise and varied to better convey the intended meaning. For instance, instead of 'make a tour,' consider using 'organize a team-building event' or 'arrange an adventure trip.' To improve lexical resource, try to incorporate more specific and descriptive words related to adventure activities and event planning. Also, ensure that the vocabulary used is appropriate for a formal letter to an adventure company.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, 'I was planning to built' should be 'I was planning to build' or 'I have been planning to build.' Additionally, 'every team members are' should be 'every team member is' or 'all team members are.' To improve grammatical accuracy, carefully proofread the letter for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. Focus on using a mix of simple and complex sentences correctly to demonstrate grammatical range.

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