Letter

Band 5+: You are planning to host a farewell party for a colleague who is leaving the company. Write a letter to your manager requesting permission to use the company's conference room for the party. In your letter, state the purpose of the party, describe the arrangements you have in mind (date, time, number of people), and explain why holding the party at the office would be convenient.

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Dear Colleagues,

I am writing to inform you all on the farewell party scheduled for Mr J. This party will be held to commemorate his dedication and commitment, efforts invested in team development, project success for the past 12 years. He has been a memorable journey with him not only as a staff member, but a visionary leader who understands and appreciates team spirit and development .

We will like to propose holding the party at syrundas event centre at London avenue as the meeting location, on 25th Feb, 12pm eastern standard time.

We will appreciate your suggestions on your input concerning the suggested venue, time and date. Also, your input regarding activities to be conducted at the event, meal menu, accommodation and more of transportation for staffs, will be greatly appreciated.

Yours sincerely,

Jake

Word Count: 135

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

party: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses all the requirements of the task, explaining the reason for the party, suggesting a date, time, and venue, and asking for suggestions. However, there are some areas where the response could be improved. The tone is generally appropriate, but could be more engaging and enthusiastic to encourage participation. The letter could benefit from more specific details about the suggested venue and potential activities to stimulate ideas from colleagues. Additionally, while the letter mentions several aspects for suggestions, it could be more focused to avoid overwhelming the recipients. Overall, the letter is well-written and fulfills the task requirements, but could be enhanced with more detail and a more engaging tone. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, particularly in the transition between explaining the party's purpose and suggesting details. To improve coherence, use clearer topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure a logical flow of ideas. For example, dedicate a paragraph solely to explaining the reason for the party before moving on to logistical details in a separate paragraph. Also, the request for suggestions is a bit muddled. Clarify what specific input you are seeking from your colleagues to enhance cohesion.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there are opportunities to use more precise and varied language. For instance, instead of 'memorable journey,' consider using phrases like 'valuable experience' or 'significant contribution.' While the language is understandable, enhancing the vocabulary will make the letter more engaging and professional.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. For example, the first paragraph has issues with sentence structure and verb tense consistency. The third paragraph also has awkward phrasing and unclear sentence construction. To improve, focus on constructing clear, concise sentences and proofread carefully for errors in grammar and punctuation. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and proper use of articles and prepositions.

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Coherence & Cohesion

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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