Letter

Band 5+: You live in a room in college that you share with another student, but there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In your letter: Describe the situation. Explain your problems and why it is difficult to work. Say what kind of accommodation you would prefer. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

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Dear Sir,

I am writing this letter to inform you about the problems i am facing with my accommodation and would like to change as soon as possible.

I am sharing this place with another student and its difficult to stay with her because she works part time and i have no problem with that but she comes late at night and make noise which disturb my sleep and i already had problem with the insomnia it was getting better but with her around me its returning back and when she does not have work she keep talking on phone and watch television until midnight.

Moreover, she is untidy not keeping things on place one day there was inspection and because of her i had to paid consequences of her. It is really difficult for me to stay with her.

So, I would like to change my room and i would prefer room for single person and for that if I have to pay extra I will and will follow other instructions you gave.

I really hope that you help me with this it will be great pleasure.

Sincerely,

Tisha Akbari

Word Count: 191

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter adequately addresses the task by describing the situation, explaining the problems, and stating the preferred accommodation. There are some minor lapses in providing sufficient detail in certain areas. To improve, provide more specific examples to strengthen your points and enhance the overall impact of your letter.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally coherent, but the organization could be improved. Consider dedicating a separate paragraph to each main point (description of the situation, explanation of problems, preferred accommodation). Using clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph would also enhance coherence. For example, you could start a paragraph with 'My main problem is...' or 'Ideally, I would prefer...'. Linking words could be used more effectively to connect ideas within and between paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement. Try to use more precise and varied vocabulary to express your concerns. For example, instead of 'make noise,' you could say 'creates disturbances' or 'is disruptive.' Instead of 'untidy,' consider 'disorganized' or 'messy.' Expanding your vocabulary range will make your writing more impactful.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and article usage. For example, 'I am sharing this place with another student and its difficult to stay with her' should be revised for clarity and grammatical accuracy. Proofread carefully to identify and correct these errors. Vary your sentence structure to improve the flow and readability of your writing.

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