Letter

Band 7+: You live in a room in college that you share with another student, but there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In your letter: Describe the situation. Explain your problems and why it is difficult to work. Say what kind of accommodation you would prefer. You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.

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To the Accommodation Officer

Mr. John Smith

Dear Mr. Smith

I would like to inform you about the inappropriate behavior of my roommate, which negatively affects on my studying and working abilities. One month ago, he refused to clean the room. Two weeks ago, he began returning late at night and knocking on the door until I opened it was a normal practice. A week ago, his noisy friends started accompanying him during these midnight visit. He swore at me when I asked him to follow the rules we mutually established before. Trying to obtain a diploma with honor, I have to study a lot, that is absolutely impossible in the current environment.

I kindly ask you to consider moving me to a different room where I would be able to finish my scientific work successfully. A single room would be the best solution and allow me to concentrate on my goals.

Yours sincerely

George Pupkin

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

7.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses the task by describing the situation, explaining the problems, and stating the preferred accommodation. The content is relevant and sufficient. To improve, consider adding more specific details about the established rules and the impact of the roommate's behavior on your studies. Also, you could mention any attempts you've made to resolve the issues directly with your roommate before contacting the accommodation officer.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is well-organized and easy to follow. The progression of problems is clear, and the request for a different room is logically presented. To enhance coherence, consider adding a sentence or two to explicitly link the described problems to the difficulty in studying. For example, you could briefly mention how the noise and disturbances directly impact your concentration and study schedule.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is appropriate and generally well-used. Phrases like 'inappropriate behavior,' 'negatively affects,' and 'mutually established' are effective. To further improve, try incorporating a wider range of vocabulary to describe the disturbances and their impact. For instance, instead of 'noisy friends,' you could use 'raucous companions' or 'disruptive guests.' Also, consider varying the language used to express your difficulty in studying; instead of 'absolutely impossible,' you could say 'severely hindered' or 'significantly compromised.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar with only minor errors. The sentence 'One month ago, he refused to clean the room' is grammatically sound. The phrase 'negatively affects on my studying' should be 'negatively affects my studying'. Overall, the grammar is accurate and doesn't impede understanding. Pay close attention to prepositions and articles for further refinement.

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