Letter

Band 4+: You recently took a part-time job working for a local company. After a few weeks, you realised there were some problems with the job. Write a letter to the manager of the company. In your letter explain why you took the job describe the problems that you experienced suggest what could be done about them

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Dear sir,

I am Fareha afrose,I am duty officer at night as a part time reciepsionist in your sea view hotel. I joined this job first July in this year. I am writing to request information about I notice some issue with my office. I know I gather experience by this job which is very beneficial for my future career. I am writing to request information about my concern and please look at the atteantion few of the problem in this hotel .So I request you please solve this problem very soon.

when I joined this job I notice some problem due to the time only I and mita who am newly employee. we manage all responsibilities during the night shift. Many staff duty time sleep in the hotel quarter. Even our rush time they did not take their responsibilities. When many guest arrived waiting hotel lodge specially all holidays. This is became disappointing on our hotel .

Moreover, our hotel breakfirst ready to serving time 7.30 am many of the time they waited our dining after 8.00 am. So, I suggest you should be tarminated this particular staff in this position. I request you look for the attention to manager please take you step in this problem and solve this matter urgently.

I look forward for your response regarding this matter.

Yours sincerely,

Fareha

Word Count: 225

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

hotel: 6

request: 4

problem: 4

please: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter generally addresses the requirements of the task, but there are significant issues with clarity and accuracy. The letter includes irrelevant or inappropriate material that detracts from the task achievement. To improve, focus on using clearer language, organizing your points logically, and ensuring your suggestions are practical and well-explained. Also, pay close attention to grammar and spelling to enhance readability.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of ideas could be improved. Consider using more explicit transitions between paragraphs to guide the reader. For example, clearly separate the reasons for taking the job, the problems encountered, and the suggested solutions into distinct paragraphs. Also, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and sometimes inaccurate. To improve, try to use more precise and varied language to describe the issues and suggestions. For instance, instead of 'look at the atteantion few of the problem,' you could say 'address the following issues.' Expanding your vocabulary will help convey your message more effectively.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains frequent grammatical errors that impede understanding. Focus on improving sentence structure, verb tense consistency, and correct use of articles and prepositions. For example, 'I notice some issue with my office' should be 'I have noticed some issues in my workplace.' Proofreading carefully and focusing on basic grammar rules will enhance clarity.

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