Letter

Band 5+: You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment. In your letter. Describe the problem with the equipment Explain how this problem is affecting your work Say what you want the shop or company to do

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing to let you know I bought keyboard yesterday, but unfortunately it dose not work; so I request to replace a new one.

For the problem of the keyboard, it has a several problems: firstly some buttons on the keyboard do not work, secondly some buttons are wrong such as press “A” but the outcome is “d”, finally it sometimes totally dose not working.

This unfortunately circumstance make me upset and very affect my working effective. Consequently, I only can use the screen keyboard for typing words which is completely impact my job and my social life.

Therefore, I hope you can check with the store of this model and arrange for replacement as soon as possible. Whereas, other model is suitable for my computer is fine.

I would appreciate it if you immediate attention regarding this matter.

Yours faithfully,

Ricky Lai

Word Count: 148

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

keyboard: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all requirements of the task, providing a clear description of the problem, its impact on work, and the desired resolution. There are a few minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasings, but these do not significantly detract from the overall effectiveness of the letter. To improve, focus on refining sentence structure and ensuring accurate grammar and word choice. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally organized, but the flow could be improved with better transitions between ideas. Consider using more cohesive devices to link sentences and paragraphs more smoothly. For example, you could use phrases like 'In addition to this' or 'As a result' to clarify the relationships between your points. Also, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. Try to incorporate more specific and descriptive words to convey your message more effectively. For instance, instead of saying 'it has a several problems,' you could say 'it has multiple malfunctions.' Expanding your range of vocabulary will make your writing more engaging and impactful.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'it does not work' instead of 'it dose not work'), correct article usage, and proper tense consistency. Review basic grammar rules and proofread carefully to minimize these errors. Also, focus on constructing more complex sentences to demonstrate a wider range of grammatical structures.

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