Letter

Band 7+: Your local hospital has advertisedfor people to do unpaid work helping at the hospital,You would like to do some work at the hospital in your free time. write a letter to the hospital.In your letter - explain why you would like to do unpaid work at the hospital. - say what type of unpaid work you would able to do. - give details when you would be available for this work

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter in regards to my volunteer work application to the hospital. It will be a privilege for me to be able to work for some time. I would like to give several information to support my application for your consideration for this role.

I am currently in my third year as a nurse student at SNU. This opportunity would be very beneficial for me to deepen my knowledge in a real world practice. On the other hand, I had several experiences from previous volunteer work, such as reception desk, assisting medical staff, and training to sterilize medical equipment. I think it would be much appreciated to get a chance to help in other roles that may encounter more with patients. I also willing to gain any practical task that the management would consider suitable for my level of expertise and experience,

I am hoping to get a chance to be able to work with other people from the field and get more experience before my final year. I will be available to accept any offer from April to June, as it is during the winter break. I have enclosed my details, including email address and phone number, in the resume attached below.

I am looking forward to receiving any consideration suitable for me.

Yours faithfully,

Mark

Word Count: 224

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

would: 4

other: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all parts of the task, providing clear reasons for wanting to volunteer, detailing suitable work types, and specifying availability. The tone is consistently polite and formal. To further enhance the response, consider providing slightly more specific examples of tasks you're willing to undertake and perhaps a more precise schedule of your availability within the April-June timeframe.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally well-organized and the purpose is clear. However, there are a few areas where the flow could be improved. For instance, the transition between explaining your nursing studies and previous volunteer work could be smoother. Consider using clearer connecting phrases to link your ideas more effectively. Also, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main point to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is appropriate for the task, but there's room to enhance it with more specific and varied language. For example, instead of saying 'give several information,' you could use 'provide detailed information.' Try to incorporate more precise terms related to hospital work and volunteering to demonstrate a stronger command of the English language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, but there are some errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and correct tense usage. For example, 'I am willing to gain any practical task' could be improved to 'I am willing to undertake any practical task.' Proofreading carefully will help eliminate these errors.

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