Opinion

Band 7+: although more people read news on internet, newspaper remains the most important source of news

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Undoubtedly, technology has advanced in all parts of a work particularly in e-news. A part of society believes that online news will replace printed newspapers, while others argue that newspapers will remain the vital source of information. In my opinion, I agree with the view that e-news is convenient to read and saves time, but newspapers provide reliable information to the people.

To begin with the benefits of reading news online, first and foremost, it is convenient to read because individuals can read the latest news online through smart phones at any time and anywhere. As a result, they can get quick news about what is happening in the world while travelling or working. Apart from this, e-news is eco-friendly because it reduces the need for paper. Consequently, it helps to protect the environment by reducing paper waste. Alternatively, e-news saves time because news can be read anywhere through the internet and also saves money because online news does not require buying a newspaper.

However, printed newspapers also have some advantages. Firstly, they are particularly useful for older people who do not know how to access online news on smartphones. So, they can read news easily without using technology. For example, many older people read newspapers in the morning with tea.Secondly, printed newspapers provide fact-based news because journalists check the information before publishing it, while online news sometimes provides false information. For example, some influencers post and share fake news online through social media.

In conclusion, no doubt, e-news is convenient and saves time, but printed newspapers provide fact-based news. I personally believe that both are important because people have different preferences.

Word Count: 272

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

online: 7

newspapers: 7

because: 6

e-news: 5

printed: 4

information: 4

saves: 4

while: 3

convenient: 3

provide: 3

through: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a clear position, though it could be more focused. The introduction states an opinion that both online and print news have merits, but the conclusion emphasizes their coexistence rather than directly answering the debate. The body paragraphs discuss relevant advantages of both formats, but the supporting ideas lack depth and precision. For example, the point about online news being eco-friendly is not fully developed, and the claim that newspapers provide fact-based news is presented without strong evidence. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea with more specific examples and analysis. Also, refine the thesis to directly state your stance on whether online news will replace newspapers or if newspapers will remain the most important source.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay is well-organized with clear paragraphing and logical progression of ideas. The introduction presents the topic and the writer's opinion, followed by two body paragraphs discussing online news and printed newspapers, and a conclusion that summarizes the main points. However, the transition between the two body paragraphs could be smoother, and the conclusion could be more decisive. To improve, use more varied linking words and ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic that is fully developed.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a good range of vocabulary appropriate for the task, such as 'convenient', 'eco-friendly', 'fact-based', and 'reliable'. There are some minor phrasing issues, such as 'in all parts of a work' which should be 'in all parts of the world', and 'wher' should be 'where'. The language is generally natural and clear, but could be more sophisticated. To improve, use more precise and varied vocabulary, and avoid repetitive phrases like 'saves time' and 'convenient'. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay demonstrates a good range of grammatical structures, including complex sentences and appropriate use of punctuation. There are only minor errors, such as missing articles and slight awkward phrasing, but they do not impede understanding. To achieve a higher score, ensure consistent accuracy in subject-verb agreement and article usage, and vary sentence structures to include more complex forms like conditionals or passive voice where appropriate.

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