Opinion

Band 4+: In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing.

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All over the world, in many countries, rural individuals are moving to urban area. therefor the Inhabitants in the town is decreasing. In my opinion, moving to rural to urban area is positive development for rural people to get more and advance fecilities and it is negative for urban areas as population are increasing rapidly so many problems are happening.

Rural people are moving to urban area for morden facilities. In urban area people get morden medical service, public transportation, school and list goes on. For example, in rural area people do not get best schools, proper medical treatment and public transport to travel, so they move to urban areas to get this type of facilities. As result, they also get better work and high salary so they can change their lifestyle.

Mass of rural people move to urban area they generate many problems. Mass of rural people rapidly move to urban area and find a house for live and use vehicales for traveling so problems like pollution and area for live’s price growing rapidly so poor families need to build weak structure for live . As result, in urban area pollution ratio is grow rapidly and price of proparty are increses too.

In conclusion, To move in urban areas are benefitiatal for rural people but on other side it creates some problems like pollution and etc.

Word Count: 227

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

urban: 10

rural: 7

people: 7

rapidly: 4

problems: 4

moving: 3

areas: 3

pollution: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt, presenting a clear position that the movement is positive for rural people but negative for urban areas. However, the development of ideas is limited and lacks precision. The first body paragraph provides some relevant examples (schools, medical treatment, transport) but could be more fully extended. The second body paragraph introduces problems like pollution and housing prices, but the explanation is somewhat unclear and underdeveloped. To improve, ensure each main idea is clearly explained and supported with specific examples or evidence. Also, work on paragraph structure and coherence, and avoid repetitive or vague statements. Proofread to correct grammatical errors and improve word choice for clarity. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear overall structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow is disrupted by abrupt transitions and repetitive phrasing. The introduction presents the opinion but lacks a clear outline of the main points. Body paragraphs are not well-linked, and the conclusion is brief and somewhat repetitive. To improve, use a wider range of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In addition', 'On the other hand') and ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic with supporting details that logically connect.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, with frequent repetition (e.g., 'rural people', 'urban area', 'move'). Some word choices are inaccurate or informal (e.g., 'morden', 'fecilities', 'proparty', 'benefitiatal'). There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary (e.g., 'inhabitants', 'rapidly'), but it is not always used correctly. To improve, expand your vocabulary for common IELTS topics (e.g., 'migration', 'urbanization', 'infrastructure', 'amenities') and practice using synonyms to avoid repetition. Ensure correct spelling and word forms. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors that affect clarity, including subject-verb agreement ('population are increasing'), incorrect verb forms ('is decreasing' vs. 'are decreasing'), missing articles ('a house', 'the population'), and punctuation issues (missing periods, incorrect capitalization). Sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited use of complex sentences. To improve, focus on basic grammar accuracy, such as subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence boundaries. Practice writing complex sentences with subordinating conjunctions (e.g., 'although', 'because', 'while') to demonstrate a wider range of structures.

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