Opinion

Band 4+: People today are more materialistic than in the past. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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There is a view that with the rapid development of society people start to become more materialistic than ever. I completely agree with this statement for several reasonse.

One reason behind my agreement lies in the fact that today having normal life conditions often increased requirement on physical possessions.As a result every step of individual’s daily life may become connected with functional things.For example people usually need cars to get to work effortlessly, machines to do chores quickly.In other words such things give access to comfortable life,which make people to care about material possessions more.

Moreover,popularity of social media also affects individual’s intention to pursue material things.Compared to before,today influencers on tiktok and Instagram actively post stories from perfect life.This results in creating an assumption among public about ideal lifestyle,which encourage people to follow them.To take brend the Dyson which is often advertised by famous bloggers for example. Due to the luxury bloggers who advertise them, this brand is associated with richness,which causes its valuing role in the society. So by that people may start to value such material things more.

To the conclusion, l firmly agree that now people are materialistic than in past, as development of technology and social media’s popularity influences people to value and pursue material things more.

Word Count: 212

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 7

material: 4

things: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position. The ideas are relevant, but the supporting details could be more precise and fully developed. To improve, focus on providing more specific examples and elaborating on the connections between materialism, technology, and social media. Also, pay attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure for clearer communication. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay's organization is somewhat clear, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the flow of ideas within paragraphs is often disrupted by grammatical errors and unclear phrasing. Transitions between sentences and ideas could be smoother. Consider using more varied cohesive devices to link ideas and improve the overall flow.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is relatively basic and sometimes inaccurate. There are instances of word choice that do not precisely convey the intended meaning. To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary and using more precise language. Pay attention to collocations and the appropriate use of words in context.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors significantly impede understanding. Focus on mastering basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Review and correct errors in your writing before submission.

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