Opinion

Band 5+: Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Nowadays, many people believe that many criminal countries have a low level of education, while others think that prisons should provide educational programs to inmates in order to reduce crime rates and help them find work after release.

On the one hand, developed countries often have high level of education whereas in countries with high level of high crime rates many criminals tend to have a low level of education. Firstly, people do not have permanent jobs. As a result, they do not have a lot of money for a basic things in life, such as food, education, medical help and insurance. Therefore, people often start to do illegal jobs. These processes walk in a circle without money. However, if people receive a good education, this problem may be reduced.

On the other hand, many people believe that prisoners should receive education in prisons. Consequently, it can help to stop unemployment in criminals’ countries. When prisoners are released, they can start a new life. Each ex- prisoners after prisons may work and only after may change in future generation.

In my opinion, only quality knowledge can help increase level of life in undeveloped countries. I agree that government should provide education in prisons.

In conclusion, many people believe that many criminals countries have a low level of education so that prisons should provide educational programs to inmates in order to reduce crime rates and help them find work after release.

Word Count: 240

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

education: 8

people: 6

countries: 6

level: 6

prisons: 4

should: 4

after: 4

believe: 3

provide: 3

crime: 3

rates: 3

prisoners: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a position, but the development of ideas is limited and lacks depth. While you identify the link between lack of education, poverty, and crime, the arguments are somewhat repetitive and the connection between prison education and the reduction of crime rates is not fully explored or explained. The conclusion also tends to repeat the introduction rather than summarizing the main arguments. To improve, try to expand on 'how' and 'why' your points are true. For example, instead of just saying education helps prisoners find work, explain how specific skills learned in prison lead to employment and how that employment prevents recidivism (re-offending). Additionally, ensure that your body paragraphs focus on developing specific arguments rather than repeating general observations. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat repetitive, and the connection between sentences is often weak. For example, the phrase 'These processes walk in a circle without money' is unclear and does not logically connect the previous points. To improve, use a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'Consequently', 'In contrast') and ensure that each sentence builds logically upon the previous one to create a smooth flow of ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is quite basic and repetitive. There is frequent repetition of words like 'many', 'people', 'education', and 'criminals'. Additionally, some word choices are inaccurate or unnatural, such as 'criminal countries' (which implies the country itself is a criminal) instead of 'countries with high crime rates', and 'increase level of life' instead of 'improve the standard of living'. Aim to use synonyms and more precise academic collocations to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and there are several grammatical errors that occasionally hinder clarity. Issues include article usage (e.g., 'a basic things' should be 'basic things'), subject-verb agreement, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'Each ex- prisoners after prisons may work and only after may change in future generation'). To improve, practice using complex sentence structures such as relative clauses and conditional sentences, and pay closer attention to noun-number agreement and article usage.

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Band 5+: Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Studies show that many criminals have a low level of education. For this reason, people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison so they can get a job when leave prison. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Some people work harder than other.Why is this?Is this a positive or negative habit?

Some people work harder than other.Why is this?Is this a positive or negative habit?

In some countries, it can be very difficult for people over the age of 50 to get good jobs, despite their experience. What do you think are the causes of this problem, and what measures could be taken to solve it?

Some people think that young people should spend their free time doing useful activities like learning new skills or helping the community. Others believe that they should be free to relax and enjoy their leisure time as they wish. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Successful sports professionals can earn a great deal more money than people in other important professions. Some people think this is fully justified while others think it is unfair. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that technology has made education more accessible and effective, while others argue that it has created more distractions and reduced learning quality. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

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