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Band 4+: There is a growing trend of people working remotely or from home. What problems can this trend create for both employees and employers, and what solutions can be implemented to address these issues?

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Nowadays, many young professionals prefer to work in their home rather than in traditional offices.It can cause many major problems that are associated with their productivity.This issue can be countered with addition of the rules that can restrict to work remotely.

Firstly,working form the home rather than in offices can kill motivation of young specialists to work hardly.That leads to the bankrupt of company.For instance, during lockdown in 2020, many major companies bankrupted, even the ones that were specialized for IT.When CEOs of these companies were asked what caused their downfall, the most popular answer conflict between their workers due to not knowing each other well.Additionally, when older members want to introduce inner rules of the company to the younger ones, they can not find them in the building, which can lead to the conflict with the managers or even head of the company due to injustice to them.

However, there are practical measures that can be taken to tackle these issues.One effective solution would be introduction of penalty for working remotely.If implemented, all young workers will come to work, this would make collective atmosphere in the work more relaxed and help to workers to get on with each other quickly.Furthermore,if new comers have some issues in their life they must tell it to the head manager, after that they should come to company for a week or more to know inner laws of company and meet older colleagues, after some periods they should share their problems with their collectives and leave working in the offices to work remotely,which could significantly reduce the problem of misunderstanding among old workers.

In conclusion, young specialists that choose to work from their home presents a serious challenges, particularly those who starts conflict with it.Nevertheless, by carrying out new penalties and rules, it is possible to mitigate these effects considerably.

Word Count: 306

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

their: 8

young: 4

company: 4

rules: 3

these: 3

conflict: 3

workers: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses both parts of the prompt (problems and solutions), but the development of ideas is limited and sometimes lacks logical clarity. While a position is present, the arguments provided are somewhat extreme or unrealistic - for example, suggesting that remote work directly causes company bankruptcy or that penalties should be used to force employees back to the office. This affects the coherence and depth of the response. To improve, focus on developing more nuanced and realistic arguments. Instead of focusing on bankruptcy, you could discuss issues like social isolation, the blurring of work-life boundaries, or communication breakdowns. For solutions, instead of 'penalties,' consider suggesting hybrid models, regular team-building activities, or digital communication tools to maintain social cohesion. Ensure that each supporting point is logically linked to the main idea to avoid leaps in reasoning.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes difficult to follow due to logical leaps. For example, the connection between remote work and company bankruptcy is presented as a direct cause-effect relationship without sufficient explanation. To improve, ensure that each sentence logically flows into the next and use a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Consequently,' 'As a result,' 'In contrast') to guide the reader through your arguments.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is sufficient to convey basic ideas, but there are frequent errors in word choice and collocation (e.g., 'work hardly' instead of 'work hard', 'bankrupt of company' instead of 'company bankruptcy', and 'inner laws' instead of 'company policies'). There is also some repetition of words like 'company' and 'workers'. To improve, focus on learning collocations and using more precise professional terminology, such as 'corporate culture,' 'employee engagement,' or 'operational efficiency.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'specialists... presents'), incorrect preposition usage, and awkward sentence structures (e.g., 'the most popular answer conflict between their workers'). There are also issues with article usage and sentence fragments. To improve, practice complex sentence structures and pay close attention to subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles (a, an, the). Reading more academic texts can help you internalize correct grammatical patterns.

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Band 4+: There is a growing trend of people working remotely or from home. What problems can this trend create for both employees and employers, and what solutions can be implemented to address these issues?

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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There is a growing trend of people working remotely or from home. What problems can this trend create for both employees and employers, and what solutions can be implemented to address these issues?

There is a growing trend of people working remotely or from home. What problems can this trend create for both employees and employers, and what solutions can be implemented to address these issues?

There is a growing trend of people working remotely or from home. What problems can this trend create for both employees and employers, and what solutions can be implemented to address these issues?

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Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

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Coherence & Cohesion

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