Opinion

Band 4+: To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

See all user-written essays on this topic

Skyrocket your IELTS band score by 1-2 points in under a month with our premium plan!

Note: Both the topic and the essay were created by one of our users.

it is mojor significant to spend time with family and friends than to focuse on career advancement. However, i particlly disagree withe the statement.

On the one hand, there are many merts of focus on career advancement. First and foremost, they will be to work in a good position in the company. The reason

behind this is they will be get a very good salary and this is very important for people. Therefore, they will receive a pension after the end of working age. Moreover, focusing on their career early in life is more essential. Because, interest in work ends after reaching old age. Thus, it becomes very difficult to adapt to work. For example, a survey conducted by the researchers of the UK indicated that 60 of people follow this rule.

On the other hand, while some other opinions about this exists. Firstly, a career can give mone but happiness can only be found whth famally. The significant reason is family members alwayes help with any problems. As a result, it makes hard work seem easlly complte. In addition, family memebrs help us when we are sick. This is a consequence of connected with family is very important. Hence, a peaceful life can be enjoued.

In conclusion, the aforementioned discussion says that there are many merits and demerits of this subject but it depends on people’s situation and thinking.

Word Count: 230

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Check My Essay

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

Generate A Sample

Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

family: 4

career: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a position, but the development of ideas is limited and inconsistent. While you identify both sides of the argument, the supporting points lack depth and logical progression. For instance, the connection between career advancement and pensions is mentioned, but the argument regarding 'interest in work ending at old age' is not fully explained. Additionally, the conclusion is somewhat vague; rather than summarizing your specific stance, it simply states that the issue depends on the individual, which weakens your overall position. To improve, ensure that every main idea is followed by a clear explanation of 'how' or 'why' it supports your point. Avoid using generic examples (like the UK survey) unless they are directly relevant and logically integrated. Most importantly, make sure your conclusion clearly restates your personal opinion to ensure your position is consistent throughout the entire essay. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is often interrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. While you use transition signals like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand,' the logical connection between sentences is sometimes weak. To improve, ensure that each sentence flows naturally into the next and that your supporting examples directly reinforce your main points.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is quite limited and contains frequent spelling mistakes (e.g., 'mojor,' 'focuse,' 'merts,' 'famally,' 'enjoued'). These errors occasionally make it difficult for the reader to understand your intended meaning. To improve, focus on learning the correct spelling of common academic words and try to use a wider variety of synonyms to avoid repetition. Aim for more precise word choices to express complex ideas. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are significant grammatical issues throughout the essay, including errors in subject-verb agreement, sentence structure, and word formation (e.g., 'they will be get,' 'some other opinions about this exists'). Many sentences are fragmented or improperly constructed, which hinders clarity. I recommend studying sentence structures, particularly how to use auxiliary verbs and how to connect clauses using subordinating conjunctions. Practicing basic grammar rules will help build a more solid foundation for more complex writing.

Essays On The Same Topic:

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

Time is an essence in one’s life. Nowadays, individuals tend to argue about how they like to spend their time in life, whether with friends and family or to pursue their career. I partially agree with this statement because they both are important in life. On the one hand, relationships with family and friends provide […]

Band 7+

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

Some people believe that concentrating on career progress is far more significant then spending time with family and friends. When career development is undoubtedly important, individuals should also allocate the equal time with loved ones. I strongly agree that passing time with family and friends is more vital then focusing on career. To begin with, […]

Band 5+

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

Some people believe that concentrating in career progress is much more important than spending time with family and friends. Giving attention on career is significant however, people should give a equal time to family and friends too. I strongly agree that maintaining good relationships with family and friends should be given greater importance. To begin […]

Band 5+

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

The topic raises the question of choosing between family and career. The most of the people dealt with it during they’re life and here is my opinion about it. First of all i need to say that I am neither agree or disagree. Furthermore, I think people do not have any need to choose between […]

Band 4+

See All

In some countries, students pay their college or university fees, while in some others, the government pays for them. Do you think the advantages that the government pays the money outweigh the disadvantages?

In contemporary society, university tuition fees are covered by some governments, while in others, students have to bear the cost themselves. Although government-funded higher education can place a considerable burden on national finances, I believe its long-term benefits outweigh this drawback because it can promote equal access to education and contribute to economic and social […]

Band 8+

In recent years, many young people spend increasing amounts of time using social media . Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

In today’s fast-paced world, youngsters spend a massive amount of their time scrolling through social media. This is because it allows them to stay in touch with relatives and friends, and provides them a source of entertainment. Its impact can be mainly positive if they do not spend excessive amounts of time on it. To […]

Band 6+

Some people think that it should be compulsory for people to take their driving test every 5 years. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing this?

There is an ongoing debate about whether governments should establish a law that would make it mandatory for people to retake their driving tests every 5 years. While some individuals believe that this would be the right decision, others see it as an additional burden for the majority of people. Personally, I strongly support the […]

Band 7+

Some people say we do not need printed newspapers anymore. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Currently, newspapers have lost their popularity. Therefore, many people believe that society does not need printed newspapers. I agree that paper newspapers are no longer needed since it saves forests, reduces pollution, and provides convenience. Undoubtedly, most people have already shifted to e-media, including online newspapers. People using the internet for following news claim that […]

Band 7+

See All

Band 4+: To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with the following statement? It is more important to spend time with family and friends than to focus on career advancement.

Other Topics:

some people believe that younger family members should be legally responsible for supporting older family members when they become physically and mentally and financially unable to look after themselves. To ehat extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, students pay their college or university fees, while in some others, the government pays for them. Do you think the advantages that the government pays the money outweigh the disadvantages?

Many people argue that in order to improve educational quality, high school students are encouraged to make comments or even criticism on their teachers. Others think it will lead to loss of respect and discipline in the classroom. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In recent years, many young people spend increasing amounts of time using social media . Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that it should be compulsory for people to take their driving test every 5 years. What are the advantages and disadvantages of doing this?

Some people say we do not need printed newspapers anymore. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample With Your Idea?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Essays On The Same Topic:

Other Topics:

Plans & Pricing

Free

Premium