Opinion

Band 4+: Without capital punishement (the death penalty), our lives are less secure and crimes of violence increase. Capital punishement is essential to control violence in society. To which extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? (200-250 words)

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without capital punishment our lives are less secure and crime of voilence increase capital punishment is essential to control voilence in society . I support this point of view that it help to determine criminals from crime and that those who commit heinous crime should face the death penalty to protect society many people claim htat our life may be less secure due to the development of criminal voilence and capital punishment is fundamental important to control crime in over society . Nowadays the percentage ofcrime rises increasing day by day

on one hand there are clear argument against capital punishment some people believed that there are not appropriate solution of this problem and they consider that re-educatio of criminals might be more effective than punishment. If criminals to providing oppertunities for rehabilitaion they can avoid crime voilence and they may become a good citizens If crime aand voilence rises increasing our lives become less secure and danger lomms over the public

on the other hand I firmly belived that capital punnishment is neccessary for contorlling voilenc in society If government effectively implement capital punishment It can help decrease crime and voilence Not controlling criminal activities can lead to extreamly serious consequences including crises in future and poverty The death penalty appropriate for sever crime as murder and if implementing death penalty lead to reduction of good approch

in conclusion l completly agree with this statment that capital punishment deterr criminals from crime as well as it is better to re-education criminals

Word Count: 252

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

crime: 9

capital: 7

punishment: 7

voilence: 6

criminals: 5

society: 4

secure: 3

death: 3

penalty: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position in agreement with capital punishment. However, the development of ideas is limited and lacks clarity in places. The arguments are not fully extended or supported with specific examples or deeper analysis. There are also issues with coherence and cohesion, as the essay lacks clear paragraphing and logical progression. To improve, focus on structuring the essay with clear topic sentences, developing each point with relevant examples, and ensuring a balanced discussion of both sides. Additionally, proofread for spelling and grammatical errors to enhance clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a basic structure with an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but the flow is often disrupted by abrupt shifts and unclear connections between ideas. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate (e.g., 'on one hand' and 'on the other hand' are used but the arguments are not clearly contrasted). Paragraphing is present but not always logical, and the overall message is difficult to follow due to frequent errors and missing transitions. To improve, focus on creating clear topic sentences, using a range of linking words appropriately, and ensuring each paragraph develops a single main idea with smooth progression.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, with frequent repetition of words like 'crime', 'violence', and 'capital punishment'. There are many spelling errors (e.g., 'voilence', 'punnishment', 'oppertunities', 'rehabilitaion') and inappropriate word choices (e.g., 'determine criminals' instead of 'deter criminals', 'good approch' instead of 'a good approach'). The lexical resource is not sufficient to convey precise meaning, and the errors often obscure the intended message. To improve, expand your vocabulary for discussing crime and punishment, practice spelling common words, and use more precise and varied expressions. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues, incorrect verb forms, missing articles, and run-on sentences. For example, 'If criminals to providing oppertunities for rehabilitaion' is ungrammatical, and 'the percentage ofcrime rises increasing day by day' is awkward and incorrect. There is little variety in sentence structures, and punctuation is often missing or incorrect, which severely affects clarity. To improve, review basic grammar rules, practice writing complex sentences with correct subordination, and proofread your work to correct errors in tense, agreement, and punctuation.

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