Bar Chart

Band 4+: The bar chart shows changes in the percentage of students with food allergy in Japan from 1992 to 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart shows changes in the percentage of students with food allergy in Japan from 1992 to 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image shows the percentage of students with food allergies over different years. In 1992, boys 4.0, girls 3.9; 1994, boys 4.1, girls 3.6; 1996, boys 4.4, girls 5.4; 1998, boys 4.3, girls 5.1; 2000, boys 3.9, girls 4.5; 2002, boys 7.9; 2004, boys 7.6, girls 8.1.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The illustrated bar chart depicts the trend in percntage of students with Food Allergy from 1992 to 2004 in Japan.

To begin with, in the year 1992 the percentage of both boys and girls was negligible with 4% and 3.9% respectively. For instance, by 0.1% increase in boys and 0.3% decrease in girls was seen in the next 2 year. However, this trend was seen opposite in the year 1996 where girls percentage rose up by 10 than that of boys but this was decreased by 0.1% after 2 years in boys making them 4.3% and 0.2 in girls which was 5.1%.

This change continued till 2000 making boys the least (3.9%)and girls was 4.5%. By contrast, girls allergic level was maximum in 2002 which was 9.6% similarly of boys 7.9%.In the year 2004 girls allergic rate decreased to 8.1% and boys went down to 7.6%.

Word Count: 146

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A1 - Beginner
Aim to use more advanced language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

girls: 7

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the task, but there are some inaccuracies in the data reported. For example, the report states that in 1996, the girls' percentage rose up by 10 than that of boys, which is incorrect. Also, the report mentions that the girls' allergic level was maximum in 2002, which was 9.6%, but the visual description states 7.9%. To improve, ensure that the data reported is accurate and consistent with the visual description. Also, the report could benefit from a clearer overall structure and a more concise summary of the main trends. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The progression of ideas is difficult to follow due to abrupt transitions and a lack of clear connections between sentences and paragraphs. Consider using more effective paragraphing and transitional phrases to improve coherence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and lacks precision. There are instances of inappropriate word choice. Expand your vocabulary and focus on using more precise and varied language to describe the data. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing. These errors significantly impede understanding. Focus on improving your understanding and application of basic grammar rules.

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Band 4+: The bar chart shows changes in the percentage of students with food allergy in Japan from 1992 to 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The bar chart shows changes in the percentage of students with food allergy in Japan from 1992 to 2004. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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