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Band 5+: The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances in one country between 1920 snd 2019.

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Image for topic: The charts below show the changes in ownership of electrical appliances in one country between 1920 snd 2019.

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The image displays a line graph indicating the percentage of households with electrical appliances from 1920 to 2019. For washing machines, percentages recorded are approximately 0% in 1920, 40% in 1940, 60% in 1960, 70% in 1980, 75% in 2000, and 80% in 2019. Refrigerators show approximately 0% in 1920, 20% in 1940, 50% in 1960, 90% in 1980, 95% in 2000, and 100% in 2019. Vacuum cleaners indicate around 0% in 1920, 30% in 1940, 60% in 1960, 80% in 1980, 95% in 2000, and 100% in 2019.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart below illustrates data about the percentage of families, who owned electrical appliances, such as washing machine, refrigerator and vacuum cleaner in on country beginning from 1920 to 2019.

Ovarall, it can be seen that there was upward trends in the percentage of households with refrigerator, vacuum cleaner and washing machine over a period in question. Another interesting point is that washing machine was the most popular electrical appliance in 1920, but in 2019 refrigerator and vacuum cleaner overtook it.

Looking at detailes, as far the percentage of refrigerator was on the bottom of the graph in 1920, but then there was a significant increase to 90 percent in 1960. After the figure hit a peak in1980 and levelled of for last 39 years. If we look at vacuum cleaner, it saw a similar trend. Having started with around 30 percent in 1920, the figure then raised considerably to 90 percent in 1980. Then it reach a peak in 2000 and stabilize for the last 19 years.

Despite starting with 40 percent in 1920, the percentage of washing machine improved remarkably to nearly 70 percent in 1960. Then there was a slight fluctuation to around 65 percent, finishing at just beyond 70 percent in 2019.

Word Count: 206

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percent: 7

percentage: 4

washing: 4

machine: 4

refrigerator: 4

vacuum: 4

cleaner: 4

there: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main trends and provides a comparison between the three appliances. However, there are several inaccuracies in data reporting that affect the clarity of the response. For instance, the report states that refrigerators and vacuum cleaners were at the bottom in 1920, but then claims washing machines were the most popular, which contradicts the visual description provided. Additionally, some specific figures (such as the refrigerator reaching 90% in 1960 instead of 1980) do not align with the trends described. To improve, ensure that the data points cited are accurately mapped to the correct years and that the overview accurately reflects the starting positions of all categories.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is occasionally hindered by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. Some cohesive devices are used, but they sometimes feel mechanical or are used incorrectly (e.g., 'as far the percentage... was on the bottom'). To improve, focus on using subordinating conjunctions and relative clauses to create smoother transitions between ideas rather than relying on repetitive sentence structures.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main ideas, but there is a lack of variety and precision. There are several spelling errors (e.g., 'Ovarall', 'detailes', 'levelled of') and some word choices are imprecise (e.g., 'improved remarkably' is better suited for quality rather than quantity; 'increased' or 'rose' would be more appropriate). Aim to use a wider range of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' and ensure that word forms (nouns vs. verbs) are used correctly.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. There are issues with subject-verb agreement ('there was upward trends'), tense consistency ('it reach a peak'), and sentence fragments ('After the figure hit a peak...'). Additionally, there are errors in preposition usage and article usage. To improve, practice complex sentence structures and pay close attention to verb tenses when describing historical data, ensuring that past tense is used consistently for completed actions in the past.

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