Letter

Band 5+: You borrowed a professional camera from your neighbor, but you accidentally dropped it and caused some damage to the lens. Write a letter to your neighbor apologizing for the accident. You should include details about: - how the accident happened - how much you regret the situation - what you propose to do to fix or replace the camera.

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Dear XYX

I am writing you to let you know that i wasn’t able to handle the camera you lend me last week and unfortunately the lens was damaged. I apologize for the damage

Let me explain you, we were taking pictures of the mountain by Monday evening. Following that i packed it in my bag. When i tried to carry the bag, it sliped from my hands and collide with the stone. Despite picking up it quick I couldn’t save the lens of camera

When i took it to repair, i was told that it cost huge amounts. Right now i am out of budget, would you please consider me for extra days so that i can repair it perfectly and return it to you.

Thank you for considering. I will soon return you In its original form

Best wishes

Word Count: 142

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter addresses the main requirements of the task: it explains what happened to the camera, expresses apology and feelings, and outlines a plan to repair it. However, there are some lapses in clarity and detail. The explanation of the incident could be more precise, and the plan for repair is somewhat vague. Additionally, the tone is polite but could be more formal and detailed. To improve, ensure all points are fully developed, use more specific language, and proofread for grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. The letter falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter has a clear structure with an opening apology, explanation, and plan, but the flow is disrupted by abrupt transitions and missing connectors. For example, the shift from the incident to the repair cost feels sudden. To improve, use linking phrases like 'Unfortunately,' 'As a result,' and 'In the meantime' to guide the reader smoothly. Also, ensure each paragraph has a single clear focus and consider adding a closing sentence that reiterates your apology and gratitude.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is basic but adequate for the task. Some phrases are awkward or informal, such as 'it cost huge amounts' and 'out of budget.' To enhance lexical range, use more precise and natural expressions like 'the repair cost is substantial' or 'I am currently unable to cover the expense.' Additionally, vary your word choices to avoid repetition (e.g., 'damage' and 'repair' are used repeatedly). A more formal tone would be appropriate for this letter to a neighbor.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are numerous grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. Examples include 'I am writing you' (should be 'I am writing to you'), 'i' (should be capitalized), 'lend' (should be 'lent'), 'sliped' (should be 'slipped'), and 'collide' (should be 'collided'). Additionally, sentence fragments and run-ons are present, such as 'Despite picking up it quick I couldn't save the lens of camera.' To improve, focus on subject-verb agreement, correct verb tenses, and proper punctuation. Reviewing basic grammar rules and proofreading your work would be beneficial.

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