Bar Chart

Band 5+: data about how families decided to spend their weekly income

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The image shows a bar chart comparing the average weekly spending by families as a percentage of weekly income in 1968 and 2018 across eight categories. In 1968, the spending percentages were: Food 35%, Housing 10%, Fuel and power 6%, Clothing and footwear 10%, Household goods 8%, Personal goods 7%, Transport 8%, and Leisure 9%. In 2018, the percentages were: Food 17%, Housing 19%, Fuel and power 4%, Clothing and footwear 5%, Household goods 7%, Personal goods 4%, Transport 14%, and Leisure 22%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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This provided bar chart presents data about how families used to spend their average weekly income in 1968 and 2018.

Overall, after analyzing this chart, it can be witnessed that in 1968, food in had the highest percentage of the weekly income, whereas fuel and power had the lowest proportion. However, in 2018, leisure had the most percentage of weekly income, while fuel and power had the least.

Firstly, 1968 had approximately half the percentage of 2018 of weekly income in food around 15%, which is a huge difference. 1968 made 10% in footware and clothing which was double the percentage in 2018. Furthermore, 1968 it also had a higher percentage in fuel and power than 2018.

Moreover, 2018 made around 18%, where 1968 made only 10%. In 2018 leisure made approximately 23% which is very higher than 2018 arond 15%, however, in household goods both 1968 and 2018 made the same percentage which is 7.5% in how the spend their weekly income.

Word Count: 163

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 6

weekly: 5

income: 5

which: 4

power: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report generally addresses the requirements of the task, but there are some inaccuracies and a lack of specific data. The organization is present but could be improved. To improve, focus on providing more precise data from the chart and ensure accurate comparisons between the two years. Also, avoid repetition and aim for a more structured and coherent presentation of the information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize the information, but the structure is not always clear. The flow of ideas could be improved with better transitions between paragraphs and sentences. The organization of details within paragraphs sometimes feels disjointed, making it harder to follow the comparisons between 1968 and 2018. Consider using more explicit linking words and phrases to guide the reader through the data.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. While the report conveys the main points, using more specific and sophisticated vocabulary could enhance the description and analysis. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'percentage,' consider synonyms like 'proportion' or 'share.' Also, try to incorporate more descriptive adjectives and adverbs to add detail and nuance to your writing. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity and readability. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and sentence structure. For example, sentences like '1968 had approximately half the percentage of 2018 of weekly income in food around 15%' and 'In 2018 leisure made approximately 23% which is very higher than 2018 arond 15%' contain grammatical inaccuracies. Focus on proofreading carefully to identify and correct these errors. Also, consider using a wider range of sentence structures to improve the overall flow and sophistication of your writing.

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Band 5+: data about how families decided to spend their weekly income

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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data about how families decided to spend their weekly income

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