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Band 5+: Pie chart to show main reason people in and out of the UK

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The image presents two pie charts detailing reasons for immigration and emigration to and from the UK in 2007. For immigration: formal study 26%, definite job 30%, accompany/join 15%, no reason stated 11%, looking for work 12%, other 6%. For emigration: formal study 4%, definite job 29%, accompany/join 13%, no reason stated 14%, looking for work 22%, other 18%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The circle graphs represent the major causes for shifting shifting to and from during 2007.

Overall, about 30% of immigration occurred due to definite job and 29% of emigration also happened due to definite job only.

Around 26% of immigration were for formal study whereas,only 4% leaves the country for sturdy, 30% of people rushed in looking out for definite job and 29% left the county for proper job. 15% came after for accompany/join, whereas, 13% of people leaves country for accompanying/ joining. Around 12% people came in for looking job and 22% emigrated county in search of job.

11% of people immigrated for other reasons and 14% of were emigrated for some other reasons.Without any particular reasons about 6% of immigration occurred and in emigration around 18% left without any particular reason. During 2007, a huge number of people immigrated to U.K for particular reasons and only few left the U.K. In that a partial group came in for formal studies and only few left for formal studies.

Word Count: 169

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 5

immigration: 3

definite: 3

formal: 3

reasons: 3

particular: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the requirements of the task, providing a general overview of the main reasons for migration to and from the UK in 2007. There is a clear overview and the main features are identified. However, there are some areas for improvement. The language could be more precise and varied, and the structure could be refined for better flow. For example, combining similar categories or grouping reasons for immigration and emigration together could enhance the analysis. Also, avoid repeating the same information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents the information in a generally understandable manner, but the organization could be improved. The overview is present but could be more impactful by directly comparing the key differences between immigration and emigration reasons. The body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and transitions, making it harder to follow the comparisons and contrasts. Consider grouping similar reasons together (e.g., job-related reasons) to enhance coherence. Also, avoid abrupt shifts in focus between immigration and emigration figures within the same sentence.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate but could be more precise and varied. There is some repetition of words like 'job,' 'study,' and 'reasons.' Try to incorporate synonyms or more specific terms to describe the reasons for migration. For example, instead of 'definite job,' you could use 'secured employment' or 'prearranged job offer.' Also, 'shifting shifting' is redundant; choose one word. Expanding your range of vocabulary will enhance the clarity and sophistication of your report.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with verb tense consistency ('were' instead of 'was'), subject-verb agreement ('immigration were'), and article usage ('the sturdy' should be 'study'). Sentence structure is also somewhat basic, limiting the complexity of the information conveyed. Focus on using a wider range of sentence structures, including complex sentences, to express relationships between data points more effectively. Proofread carefully to correct grammatical errors and improve overall accuracy.

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