Bar Chart

Band 7+: The bar chart illustrates the water levels of 6 cosmopolises in Australia in October 2009 and 2010

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Image for topic: The bar chart illustrates the water levels of 6 cosmopolises in Australia in October 2009 and 2010

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The image displays a chart illustrating reservoir water levels as percentages for Darwin, Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane, Perth, and Canberra during October 2009 and October 2010. In Oct 2009, Darwin registered 25%, Sydney 60%, Melbourne 25%, Brisbane 45%, Perth 20%, Canberra 50%. In Oct 2010, Darwin increased to 30%, Sydney escalated to 75%, Melbourne rose to 50%, Brisbane heightened to 55%, Perth grew to 25%, Canberra dramatically surged to 100%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line graph provides information how many people played different kinds of sports in particular country from 1985 to 2005.

Overall, it is clear that tennis showed significant rise over the period, while rugby experienced an extremely downward trend. Basketball showed period of volatility and badmington remained untouched throughout the period. Notably, although rugby was the most popular sport at the beginning, it fell dramatically until it ended up being the least engaging.

Looking first at tennis, there was a significant increase in number of people who took part in it. In 1985, about 150 people played tennis then the figure rose gradually over the years, finishing at about 220 in 2005.

Turning to rugby, it followed a different pattern. In 1985, it was at the top, with the largest figure. After that it started declining enormously. By 2000, it lost almost half of its participants, accounting for 150. In 2005, people who played rugby was only 50.

As regards basketball and badmington, similar trend was observed for them. In 1985, only about 80 participants was in basketball, while the figure for those who interested in badmington was even lower, at just under 50. Then the figure for basketball started fluctuating slightly over the period, finishing at approximately the same number as it started. In 1990, badmington decreased slightly, then it remained stable until the end, making up roughly 200.

Word Count: 230

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 4

period: 4

rugby: 4

basketball: 4

badmington: 4

figure: 4

played: 3

tennis: 3

about: 3

started: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately addresses the task, presenting the main trends and making relevant comparisons. The overview is clear, and the body paragraphs discuss the sports individually with supporting data. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported, particularly regarding badminton, which impacts the accuracy of the overall description. To improve, ensure all data points are accurately represented and proofread for minor grammatical errors.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear structure, including an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs for each sport. The use of cohesive devices is adequate, but there's room for improvement to make the transitions smoother and the connections between ideas more explicit. For instance, in the overview, you could add a sentence summarizing the overall trends of all sports to provide a clearer picture. In the body paragraphs, using more varied transition words and phrases would enhance the flow.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, including terms like 'significant rise,' 'downward trend,' 'volatility,' and 'fluctuating.' However, there are instances where the language could be more precise and sophisticated. For example, instead of 'badmington remained untouched,' you could use 'badminton remained relatively stable.' Also, consider using synonyms to avoid repetition, such as varying how you describe increases and decreases.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report exhibits a good command of grammar, with a variety of sentence structures used. However, there are some grammatical errors that need attention. For example, 'how many people played different kinds of sports in particular country' should be 'how many people played different kinds of sports in a particular country.' Also, 'people who played rugby was only 50' should be 'people who played rugby were only 50.' Proofreading carefully for subject-verb agreement and correct article usage will improve the accuracy of your writing.

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