Bar Chart

Band 6+: The bar chart shows the amount of money spent on two types of electronic items in country X. Summarise the information in the chart by selecting and reporting the main features. Make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The bar chart shows the amount of money spent on two types of electronic items in country X. Summarise the information in the chart by selecting and reporting the main features. Make comparisons where relevant.

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The image depicts a bar chart with annual sales (million dollars) for two electronic items in country X from 2011 to 2015. In 2011, Computers: 35, Smartphones: 10. In 2012, Computers: 40, Smartphones: 15. In 2013, Computers: 40, Smartphones: 25. In 2014, Computers: 35, Smartphones: 30. In 2015, Computers: 30, Smartphones: 50.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The diagram delineates how much money was spent on two types of electrical items, such as computers and smartphones in country X.

Looking from an overall perspective, it is readily apparent that more money spent on computers than smartphones in the each year. The biggest difference between spent money for devices was in 2013, whereas the smallest one was in 2015.

Firstly, 30 million dollars spent on computers in 2011, whilst only 10 million dollars spent on smartphones each year from 2011 to 2013. The amount of money spent on computers inclined by 5 million dollars in 2012, and accounted 40 million dollars in 2013.

Secondly, the difference of money that spent on electrical devices reduced by 15 million dollars in 2014. The expenditure on computers(45 million dollars) was higher than on smartphones, which accounted for 30 million dollars. The spending on smartphones was not as high as on computers, with 45 million dollars compared to 50 million dollars in turn.

Word Count: 161

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

million: 9

dollars: 8

spent: 7

money: 5

computers: 5

smartphones: 5

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task but contains inaccuracies and some irrelevant information. The overview is acceptable, but the body paragraphs include incorrect data and comparisons. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data from the chart and ensure that all comparisons are based on the provided information. Also, avoid introducing information not present in the chart.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize information, but the flow could be improved. The overall structure is present, but the transitions between ideas and paragraphs are not always smooth. For instance, the transition from the overview to the detailed analysis in the body paragraphs could be clearer. Also, the second body paragraph contains some confusing information and unclear connections between sentences. To improve coherence, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, clear aspect of the data and use transition words to link ideas logically.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a range of vocabulary relevant to the task, such as 'delineates,' 'expenditure,' and 'inclined.' However, there are instances where the word choice could be more precise or natural. For example, 'money spent on devices' could be rephrased for better clarity. To enhance lexical resource, focus on using synonyms and varied vocabulary to describe trends and comparisons more effectively. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are noticeable grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include incorrect verb tenses ('money spent on computers than smartphones in the each year'), subject-verb agreement issues ('30 million dollars spent on computers in 2011'), and awkward phrasing ('The difference of money that spent on electrical devices reduced'). To improve grammatical accuracy, carefully proofread for common errors and focus on mastering accurate sentence construction.

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