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Band 4+: The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

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Image for topic: The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

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The image presents bar charts detailing employment percentages for men and women aged 60-64 across Belgium, USA, Japan, and Australia for the years 1970 and 2000. For men: Belgium 1970 (42%), 2000 (79%); USA 1970 (55%), 2000 (73%); Japan 1970 (80%), 2000 (74%); Australia 1970 (60%), 2000 (69%). For women: Belgium 1970 (7%), 2000 (12%); USA 1970 (36%), 2000 (41%); Japan 1970 (43%), 2000 (54%); Australia 1970 (18%), 2000 (37%).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The picture below contains two diagrams which demonstrate a percentage of males and females in four countries for the years 1999 and 2010.

It can be noticed that in Belgium proposition of employed men in 1990 was 4 times more than in 2000 while women has not significantly changed. In the USA 10 years have not brought about some drastic changes. While males’ percentage has decreased by 18 percent, females’ has flourished by 3. Almost the same situation happened in Japan, the only difference that women’s percentage decreased by 3. Australia has been effected more compared to previous two, amount of male workers declined by 30 percent and females have thrived from 16 to 18.

In summary, it can be easily noticed that men works more in the age gap between 60 and 64, but tends among them is different, while somewhere percentage of employed women increased, males’ proposition was only downgrading

Word Count: 152

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percentage: 4

while: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the data. The years are incorrectly stated as 1999 and 2010 instead of 1970 and 2000, and the data for Belgium, the USA, and Japan are misreported (e.g., Belgium men's employment is said to be four times higher in 1990 than 2000, which is reversed; the USA men's percentage is said to have decreased by 18%, but it actually increased; Japan women's percentage is said to have decreased, but it increased). The summary is somewhat relevant but includes a vague and grammatically unclear statement. To improve, ensure accurate data representation, correct year references, and provide a clear overview of the main trends.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a logical structure with an introduction, body, and summary, but the flow is disrupted by unclear referencing and abrupt transitions. For example, the phrase 'the picture below contains two diagrams' is vague, and the shift from discussing specific countries to the summary is not smooth. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph and ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea. Additionally, use cohesive devices (e.g., 'in contrast', 'similarly') to link ideas more effectively, and avoid introducing new information in the summary.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and repetitive, with errors such as 'proposition' instead of 'proportion' and 'tends' instead of 'trends'. There is an attempt to use a range of expressions (e.g., 'flourished', 'thrived'), but these are not always accurate or natural. To improve, use precise and varied vocabulary related to data description (e.g., 'accounted for', 'experienced a rise', 'saw a decline'), and ensure correct word choice. Avoid informal or inaccurate terms like 'flourished' for percentages; instead, use 'increased' or 'rose'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that affect clarity. Examples include subject-verb agreement ('women has not significantly changed'), incorrect tense usage ('has been effected'), and missing articles ('a percentage of males'). There is also a lack of variety in sentence structures, with many simple sentences. To improve, practice using a mix of complex and compound sentences, ensure subject-verb agreement, and proofread for common errors. Pay attention to correct use of prepositions and articles, and avoid direct translation from your native language.

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The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

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Band 4+: The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

The bar chart shows the proportion of men and women aged 60-64 employed in four different countries in 1990 and 2000.

Other Topics:

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The pie charts below show the spending habits of people in India in 2000 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graph and pie chart below give information on in-house training courses in a large financial company. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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