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Band 6+: The canging rates od crime in the inner city from 2003-2012

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The image shows a line graph titled 'Food Consumption in China, 1985-2010', with the y-axis representing grams/person/week. It plots consumption for three food categories: Meat, Salt, and Fish. For Meat, the data points in grams are: 1985, 100; 1990, 150; 1995, 180; 2000, 190; 2005, 200; and 2010, 200. For Salt, the data points are: 1985, 490; 1990, 450; 1995, 380; 2000, 320; 2005, 250; and 2010, 200. For Fish, the data points are: 1985, 600; 1990, 700; 1995, 600; 2000, approximately 710; 2005, 750; and 2010, 850.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The data regarding the changes in food consumption by the Chinese citizen from 1985 to 2010 has been illustrated by the line chart.

Overall, the meat and fish consumption increased steadily, while the salt consumption has decreased .

To begin with, people collected 100 grams of meat for consumption in 1985. After that the expenditure on meat grew dramatically between 1985 and 2000, which was at around 200 grams. From 2000 to 2010 the spending was almost stable (200 grams). In the year of 1985, almost 500 people spent their earn on salt. After that, spending decreased between 1985 and 2010. The figure counted at around 200.

In respect of fish, almost 600 people spent their money on consumption in 1985. The figure has increased significantly from 1985 to 1990, which was at around 700. Between 1990 and 1995 the figure followed the downward trend, which counted for 600. After that the figures increased gradually from 2010, which was at around 850.

Word Count: 162

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

consumption: 5

which: 4

around: 4

increased: 3

people: 3

after: 3

between: 3

almost: 3

figure: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends in the graph and provides relevant data. However, there are some minor inaccuracies and omissions. For example, the report mentions 'people' spending on salt, which is not accurate. To improve, ensure all data points are correctly interpreted and presented, and avoid generalizations that misrepresent the information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally understandable, but the flow could be improved. The organization into paragraphs is logical, but the transitions between sentences and ideas within paragraphs could be smoother. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more effectively. For example, using 'However' or 'In contrast' to highlight differences in trends, or 'Similarly' to show parallel developments. Also, ensure that each sentence logically follows from the previous one, creating a more coherent narrative.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. While words like 'increased' and 'decreased' are used correctly, consider incorporating more specific and descriptive terms to convey the nuances of the data. For instance, instead of 'increased steadily,' you could use 'experienced a gradual rise' or 'saw a consistent upward trend.' Similarly, explore synonyms for 'stable' and 'dramatically' to add depth to your descriptions. Also, avoid using 'people spent their earn/money' - this is not the correct phrasing. Instead, use 'consumption of salt was X grams'. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. While the overall meaning is usually clear, these errors can distract the reader and undermine the credibility of the writing. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and accurate preposition usage. For example, 'people collected 100 grams of meat' is not the best phrasing; consider 'meat consumption was 100 grams per person'. Also, 'the spending was almost stable' should be 'consumption was almost stable'. Review and correct these errors to improve the grammatical accuracy of your writing.

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