Bar Chart

Band 5+: The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

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Image for topic: The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

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The image illustrates the percentage of children aged 11 to 16 traveling to school in the UK by different modes and distances: walking shows 0-1 mile at 80%, 1-2 miles at 60%, 2-5 miles at 20%; bicycling shows 0-1 mile at 1%, 1-2 miles at 2%, 2-5 miles at 3%; car travel shows 0-1 mile at 11%, 1-2 miles at 20%, 2-5 miles at 30%, over 5 miles at 10%; bus travel shows 2-5 miles at 38%, over 5 miles at 55%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart provides data on how adolescents reach their schools in the UK.

Overall, the majority of children prefer walking to cross the span, whereas those who live further tend to take a bus.

As can be seen in the chart, walking and taking a bus are the most popular options. A large proportion of pupils who overcome the distance less than 1 mile are likely to move on foot, but no-one walks over 5 miles.Nearly 65% of long-distance commuters lean toward going by bus while those who live a bit closer take nearly a third, and others hardly ever choose this option.

Private vehicles are used by all of the children; however, the percentage of car’s usage varies, whereas that of bicycle is almost equal for everyone, which is no more than 10% for every type of students. Those whose distance is 2-5 miles are likely to go by car. At the same time, this category takes a around 5% of living nearby pupils.

Word Count: 166

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

those: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main trends and provides a general overview, which is good. However, there are some inaccuracies in data interpretation and phrasing that affect clarity. For instance, stating that private vehicles are used by 'all of the children' is an overgeneralization, and the description of bicycle usage as 'no more than 10%' is technically correct but fails to highlight how extremely low those figures actually are (1-3%). To improve, ensure that comparisons between categories are more precise and avoid hyperbolic language like 'overcome the distance' or 'long-distance commuters' when describing school children. Focus on more direct descriptions of the data points provided.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report attempts to organize information into paragraphs, but the logical flow is occasionally disrupted by awkward phrasing. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices (e.g., 'Overall', 'As can be seen', 'however'), some transitions feel forced or unclear. For instance, the connection between the sentence about car usage and the sentence about bicycle usage is somewhat muddled. To improve, ensure that each sentence leads logically to the next and that your grouping of information follows a clear pattern (e.g., grouping by mode of transport or by distance).

Lexical Resource

There is an attempt to use varied vocabulary (e.g., 'adolescents', 'commuters', 'proportion'), but many word choices are imprecise or used incorrectly in context. Phrases like 'cross the span', 'overcome the distance', and 'takes a around 5% of living nearby pupils' are unnatural and obscure the intended meaning. Focus on using more standard academic collocations for describing data, such as 'travel a distance of' instead of 'overcome the distance', and ensure that your synonyms for 'students' or 'children' are used appropriately. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a mix of simple and complex structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and sometimes impede communication. There are issues with article usage, possessives (e.g., 'car's usage'), and sentence construction (e.g., 'which is no more than 10% for every type of students'). Additionally, some sentences are overly long and convoluted, making them difficult to parse. Aim for greater precision in your grammar, particularly with subject-verb agreement and the correct use of relative clauses.

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Band 5+: The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

The chart below gives information about the journeys to school by children aged 11 to 16 in the UK in 2013.

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