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Band 5+: the chart below show the proportions of british students at on university?

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The image shows pie charts comparing the proportion of British students at a university in England who could speak other languages besides English in 2000 and 2010. In 2000, no other language: 20%, French only: 15%, German only: 10%, Spanish only: 15%, another language: 15%, and two other languages: 15%. In 2010, no other language: 10%, French only: 10%, German only: 10%, Spanish only: 20%, another language: 15%, and two other languages: 15%.

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The displayed figure depicts data about the percentage of British learners at a speci fic university in England and their abillity to communicate in languages other than English in 2000 and 2010 and the reasults are measured in percentages.

Overall, it is evident that students proportion in speaking spanish only were the highest in both mentioned years . clearly the student proportion surpassed all other proportions by a substential margin . However the percentage to speak in two other languages and german only was the lowest in the year 2000 . As well as German only , french only and no other languages remaind the lowest in 2010 .

Moving to detailes , the percentage of learners ability to speak French only in addition to English were lower by 5% in 2010. Only speaking german as a seconed language remained steady at 10% .

In contrast , the proportion of student who spoke another languages , two other languages and spanish only were diffrent . Although they all were accounted higher by 5% .

Surprisingly, the propotion of students who spoke no other languages witnessed a massive decrease and got dropped by the half .

Word Count: 195

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

languages: 6

other: 6

percentage: 3

proportion: 3

german: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report provides a clear overview and addresses the main trends in the data, such as the increase in Spanish-only speakers and the decrease in students speaking no other language. The overall structure is logical, with an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions in the data (e.g., stating that 'two other languages' and 'German only' were the lowest in 2000, which is not entirely accurate based on the visual description). Additionally, there are minor spelling and grammatical errors (e.g., 'abillity', 'reasults', 'substential', 'detailes', 'seconed', 'propotion') that slightly affect clarity. To improve, ensure all data points are correctly referenced and proofread for spelling and grammar. The report could also benefit from more precise language when describing changes, such as specifying exact percentages where relevant.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a basic structure with an introduction, an overview, and some detailed comparisons. However, the flow is disrupted by unclear referencing and abrupt transitions. For example, the phrase 'As well as German only, french only and no other languages remaind the lowest in 2010' is confusing. The paragraphing could be improved to separate the overview from the details more clearly. To improve, use clear topic sentences and ensure each paragraph focuses on a distinct aspect of the data.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but limited and contains several errors and awkward phrases. Examples include 'substential margin', 'reasults', 'abillity', 'propotion', and 'seconed language'. The phrasing 'students proportion in speaking spanish only' is unnatural. To improve, use a wider range of precise vocabulary (e.g., 'proportion', 'percentage', 'remained stable', 'experienced a decline') and ensure correct spelling and word forms.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains frequent grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. Examples include missing commas after introductory phrases ('Overall, it is evident...'), incorrect verb forms ('remaind', 'got dropped'), and subject-verb agreement errors ('students proportion... were'). Sentence structures are often repetitive or incomplete. To improve, practice using a variety of sentence structures (simple, compound, complex) and review basic grammar rules, especially verb tenses and punctuation.

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