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Band 4+: the chart below shows the information about three different deserts around the world

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Image for topic: the chart below shows the information about three different deserts around the world

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The image presents comparative data on three deserts: Saharan Desert, Taklimakan Desert, and Great Basin Desert. Saharan Desert covers 9,000,000 sq km, with annual rainfall of 7.6 cm in the north and 12.7 cm in the south, average temperatures at 30°C in summer and 13°C in winter, and a temperature extreme of 58°C. Taklimakan Desert spans 270,000 sq km, its annual rainfall is 3.8 cm in the west and 1.0 cm in the east, average temperatures are 25°C in summer and -9°C in winter, with a temperature extreme of -26.1°C. Great Basin Desert covers 305,775 sq km, with annual rainfall between 5.1 and 51 cm, average temperatures at 30°C in summer and -8°C in winter, reaching a temperature extreme of 57°C.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table illustrate and compare different deserts in some areas in the world.

Overall, the table provide informations about three deserts a size, average annual rainfall, average temparatures and temperature extermes levels.Sahara desert located in Africa, Taklimakan desert located in Asia and Great Basin desert in North America .

A Great Basin desert size(305,775 sq km) length is longer than Sahara and Taklimakan deserts.An average rainfall level in Sahara northestern is reashed 7.6 cm and in southesten area the rainfall level is created 12.7 cm .Great Basin annual rainfall 5.1-51 cm ,in comparasion Taklimakan desert average level in western cwas create 3.8 cm and easten about 1.0 cm.

Average temparatures three deserts in summer and winter shows various level.For example; Bassin desert’s summer the temperature was around 30 C and a winter -8C , in summer season of Taklimakan temparature was 25C and winter -9C. In addition to , Sahara summer season temparature reached 30C ,in winter 13C.Sahara and Great Basin deserts temparature extermes shows highest recorded around 58 C and 57 C. in contrast ,Taklimakan desert exterme percentage provided lowest point, nearly -26.1 C.

Word Count: 185

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

desert: 6

taklimakan: 5

deserts: 4

average: 4

rainfall: 4

great: 4

basin: 4

summer: 4

winter: 4

sahara: 3

level: 3

temparature: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task by attempting to compare the three deserts across the specified categories (size, rainfall, temperature). An overview is provided, and data from the visual description is included. However, there are significant issues with data accuracy and logical presentation. For instance, the report incorrectly states that the Great Basin desert is larger than the Sahara, which contradicts the provided data. Additionally, the description of rainfall and temperature is sometimes fragmented or uses confusing phrasing. To improve, focus on ensuring mathematical comparisons (larger/smaller) are accurate and work on the clarity of your sentence structures to ensure the relationships between the data points are easy for the reader to follow.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report struggles to maintain a smooth flow of information. While there is an attempt to use cohesive devices (e.g., 'Overall', 'In addition to', 'In contrast'), they are often used incorrectly or are punctuated poorly, which disrupts the reader's ability to follow the logic. Paragraphing is present, but the internal organization of sentences is fragmented. To improve, focus on using transition words more naturally and ensuring that each sentence connects logically to the next. Avoid using semicolons incorrectly and ensure there is a space after every period.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is quite limited and contains several spelling errors (e.g., 'temparatures', 'extermes', 'northestern', 'southesten', 'cwas'). There is also some misuse of words, such as using 'length' to describe area or 'percentage' to describe a temperature extreme. To improve, work on building a bank of academic synonyms for describing data (e.g., 'spans', 'covers', 'ranges from', 'reaches') and ensure that the terminology used matches the type of data being presented (e.g., use 'area' instead of 'length' for square kilometers).

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and significantly impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'table illustrate', 'table provide'), missing verbs (e.g., 'Sahara desert located'), and incorrect sentence structures. The use of articles is inconsistent, and many sentences are run-on or incomplete fragments. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures (Subject + Verb + Object) and ensure that every sentence has a clear, functioning verb. Practice using complex sentences with subordinating conjunctions to link ideas more effectively.

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